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So the American government lied to the Native Americans for many,
by Eddie Izzard

So the American government lied to the Native Americans for many,
many years, and then President Clinton lied about a relationship,
and everyone was surprised!
A little naive, I feel!
- Eddie Izzard

MAC gave me 55 lipsticks to test.
These are the same lipsticks I got caught stealing
by the police when I was 15.
How ironic.
- Eddie Izzard

I like my coffee like I like my women.
In a plastic cup.
- Eddie Izzard

Never put a sock in a toaster.
- Eddie Izzard

 

I grew up in Europe, where the history comes from.
- Eddie Izzard

I wanna live 'til I die, no more, no less.
- Eddie Izzard

I'm a one-man idiot.
- Eddie Izzard

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If you've never seen an elephant ski,
you've never been on acid.
- Eddie Izzard

They tend to come out a colour called 'Pants left in wash'
- Eddie Izzard

Boy bands should be exploded from a great height.
They're just pretty people singing music written by others.
- Eddie Izzard

We do not inherit the Earth from our ancestors,
we borrow it from our children.
- Native American Proverb

Treat the earth well.
It was not given to you by your parents,
it was loaned to you by your children.
We do not inherit the Earth from our Ancestors,
we borrow it from our Children.
- Native American traditional

I was born on the prairies where the wind blew free
and there was nothing to break the light of the sun.
I was born where there were no enclosures.
- Geronimo

Listen or your tongue will keep you deaf.
- Native American Proverb

We will be known forever by the tracks we leave.
- American Indian Proverb

Solitude is considered un-American.
- Erica Jong

Treat the earth well,
It was not given to you by your parents,
It was loaned to you by your children.
- Native American Proverb

I am proud to be an American.
Because an American can eat anything on the face of
this earth as long as he has two pieces of bread.
- Bill Cosby

A truly American sentiment recognizes the dignity of
labor and the fact that honor lies in honest toil.
- Grover Cleveland

This is the city of dreamers and time and again it's
the place where the greatest dream of all,
the American dream, has been tested and has triumphed.
- Michael Bloomberg

Golf is played by twenty million mature American men
whose wives think they are out having fun.
- Jim Bishop

Confronted with the choice, the American people would
choose the policeman's truncheon over the anarchist's bomb.
- Spiro T. Agnew

I have designed the most buildings of any living American architect.
- Alexander Jackson Davis

Nobody ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public.
- H. L. Mencken

The real 1960s began on the afternoon of November 22,
1963.
It came to seem that Kennedy's murder opened some malign
trap door in American culture,
and the wild bats flapped out.
- Lance Morrow

I met an American woman and got married so I had to get a job.
- Walter Wager

If American men are obsessed with money,
American women are obsessed with weight.
The men talk of gain, the women talk of loss,
and I do not know which talk is the more boring.
- Marya Mannes

An Englishman teaching an American about food is like
the blind leading the one-eyed.
- A. J. Liebling

Managers in all too many American companies do not
achieve the desired results because nobody makes them do it.
- Harold S. Geneen

It is money, money, money!
Not ideas, not principles, but money that reigns supreme in American politics.
- Robert Byrd

It looks to me to be obvious that the whole world cannot eat an American diet.
- Jerry Brown

Wit - the salt with which the American humorist spoils
his intellectual cookery by leaving it out.
- Ambrose Bierce

The average American is nothing if not patriotic.
- Herbert Croly

Earth Day 1970 was irrefutable evidence that the American
people understood the environmental threat and wanted action to resolve it.
- Barry Commoner

All of the books in the world contain no more information
than is broadcast as video in a single large American city in a single year.
Not all bits have equal value.
- Carl Sagan

Most American children suffer too much mother and too little father.
- Gloria Steinem

Any American who is prepared to run for president should automatically,
by definition, be disqualified from ever doing so.
- Gore Vidal

I give you this one thought to keep -
I am with you still - I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the diamond glints on snow,
I am the sunlight on ripened grain,
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush,
I am the sweet uplifting rush,
of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft starts that shine at night.
Do not think of me as gone -
I am with you still in each new dawn.
- Traditional Native American Prayer

If the new American father feels bewildered and even defeated,
let him take comfort from the fact that whatever he
does in any fathering situation has a fifty percent chance of being right.
- Bill Cosby

No greater nor more affectionate honor can be conferred
on an American than to have a public school named after him.
- Herbert Hoover

Citizen Kane is perhaps the one American talking picture
that seems as fresh now as the day it opened.
It may seem even fresher.
- Pauline Kael

We, therefore, here in Britain stand shoulder to shoulder
with our American friends in this hour of tragedy,
and we, like them, will not rest until this evil is driven from our world.
- Tony Blair

I see great things in baseball.
It's our game - the American game.
- Walt Whitman

I stand fearlessly for small dogs, the American Flag,
motherhood and the Bible.
That's why people love me.
- Art Linkletter

The beef industry has contributed to more American
deaths than all the wars of this century,
all natural disasters, and all automobile accidents combined.
- Neal Barnard

Protecting the institution of marriage safeguards,
I believe, the American family.
- John Boehner

The IQ and the life expectancy of the average American
recently passed each other in opposite directions.
- George Carlin

Half of the American people have never read a newspaper.
Half never voted for President.
One hopes it is the same half.
- Gore Vidal

I know only two words of American slang,
'swell' and 'lousy'.
I think 'swell' is lousy, but 'lousy' is swell.
- J. B. Priestley

An American, a Negro...
two souls, two thoughts, two unreconciled strivings;
two warring ideals in one dark body,
whose dogged strength alone keeps it from being torn asunder.
- W. E. B. Du Bois

American advertisers rely on 'essentially illogical'
approaches to determine their advertising budgets.
- Michael Schudson

There is a whole school of Canadian academics,
media personalities, and politicians whose definition
of a Canadian is a North American who fears or dislikes the United States.
- Preston Manning

I think the most un-American thing you can say is,
'You can't say that.'
- Garrison Keillor

New York is the meeting place of the peoples,
the only city where you can hardly find a typical American.
- Djuna Barnes

58% of the American public are with us.
We're preaching to the choir, but the choir's not singing,
if all of the 58% started singing, this war would end.
- Cindy Sheehan

I'm very aware when I'm speaking to the English of
how flat my Mid-Atlantic American voice is.
- Martin C. Smith

The fact is, beneath the hype, Iraqis will soon appreciate
American help and idealism far more than French perfidy.
It is never wrong to be on the side of freedom -
never.
- Victor Davis Hanson

The older painting - well, it does have an effect all at once,
I suppose, but it's of a lesser intensity than a lot
of the American work in the last ten or fifteen years.
- Donald Judd

I think the Iraq War is not particularly tailored to American interests.
- Peter Brimelow

A pitfall of making a comedy with a studio-and it's
also an American cultural thing-is that I get tired
of being encouraged to go always for laughs.
- Alexander Payne

If every American donated five hours a week,
it would equal the labor of 20 million full-time volunteers.
- Whoopi Goldberg

Israeli interests are not necessarily in harmony with the American interests.
- Bashar al-Assad

The eventual place the American army should take on
the western front was to a large extent influenced
by the vital question of communication and supply.
- Kelly Miller

I think The Exorcist is the best American horror movie ever made.
Friedkin was at the top of his game.
- Jason Patric

The Korean war has always been an unpopular war among the American people.
- Paul Robeson

But it seemed to me that the American way of doing
things was to obliterate a complete area,
without really knowing exactly what was there and where they were.
- Peter Scott

Mr. President, the buzz saw that your healthcare bill
ran into wasn't lobbyists and special interests it
was tens of millions of American's who were saying,
'Stop!'
- John Boehner

I don't think the creative writing industry has helped American poetry.
- Robert Morgan

We are African in origin and American in birth.
- Timothy Thomas Fortune

Black women have always been these vixens,
these animalistic erotic women.
Why can't we just be the sexy American girl next door?
- Tyra Banks

The American people have no control over what the military does.
We have no say in American foreign policy.
- Aaron McGruder


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