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My doctor gave me six months to live,
by Walter Matthau

My doctor gave me six months to live,
but when I couldn't pay the bill he gave me six months more.
- Walter Matthau

Related topics: Medical

It's very easy to live here.
You're anonymous here.
Nobody knows who you are.
- Walter Matthau

We're writing a book together.
She just finished one.
Did you read it? Among the Porcupines?
- Walter Matthau

The first girl you go to bed with is always pretty.
- Walter Matthau

 

Every actor looks all his life for a part that will
combine his talents with his personality...
'The Odd Couple' was mine.
That was the plutonium I needed.
It all started happening after that.
- Walter Matthau

I wanted to be a pharmacist.
I liked the way our local pharmacist was always dressed in a nice white coat;
he looked very calm,
you'd give him money, and he'd give you something that you wanted to buy.
- Walter Matthau

A doctor can bury his mistakes
but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

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I have a very low threshold of death.
My doctor says I can't have bullets enter my body at any time.
- the Woody Allen movie Casino Royale

I've got to go.
That's one of the penalties of being a doctor.
I never seem to finish a conversation.
- Robert M. Fresco

One has a greater sense of degradation after an interview
with a doctor than from any human experience.
- Alice James

I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet,
so he gave me pep pills.
Know what happened? I ate faster.
- Joe E. Lewis

I was going to have cosmetic surgery until I noticed
that the doctor's office was full of portraits by Picasso.
- Rita Rudner

Oh no, I can't do anything to the death.
Doctor's orders. You see, I have this ulcer condition,
and death is the worst thing for it.
- the movie Love and Death

The doctor has been taught to be interested not in health but in disease.
What the public is taught is that health is the cure for disease.
- Ashley Montagu

Whenever a doctor cannot do good, he must be kept from doing harm.
- Hippocrates

When a man goes through six years training to be a
doctor he will never be the same.
He knows too much.
- Enid Bagnold

Illness is the doctor to whom we pay most heed;
to kindness,
to knowledge, we make promise only; pain we obey.
- Marcel Proust

When I was born I was so ugly the doctor slapped my mother.
- Rodney Dangerfield

Medical liability reform is not a Republican or Democrat
issue or even a doctor versus lawyer issue.
It is a patient issue.
- John Ensign

The emotional, sexual, and psychological stereotyping
of females begins when the doctor says:
It's a girl.
- Shirley Chisholm

A pregnant woman facing the most dire circumstances
must be able to count on her doctor to do what is medically
necessary to protect her from serious physical harm.
- Barbara Mikulski

Passion, you see, can be destroyed by a doctor.
It cannot be created.
- Peter Shaffer

When I was 40, my doctor advised me that a man in his
40s shouldn't play tennis.
I heeded his advice carefully and could hardly wait
until I reached 50 to start again.
- Hugo Black

The best doctor is the one you run to and can't find.
- Denis Diderot

My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four.
Unless there are three other people.
- Orson Welles

I'm 86 and my doctor used to tell me to slow down -
at least he did until he dropped dead.
- Cesar Romero

Music's not like becoming a doctor, who can walk into
a community and find people who need him.
- Charlie Byrd

It is reasonable to expect the doctor to recognize
that science may not have all the answers to problems of health and healing.
- Norman Cousins

Three-quarters of the sicknesses of intelligent people
come from their intelligence.
They need at least a doctor who can understand this sickness.
- Marcel Proust

I was obsessed with romance.
When I was in high school, I saw 'Doctor Zhivago' every
day from the day it opened until the day it left the theater.
- John Hughes

I regret to this day that I never went to college.
I feel I should have been a doctor.
- Ty Cobb

The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind;
the lawyer all the wickedness,
the theologian all the stupidity.
- Arthur Schopenhauer

Honestly, being a doctor could make you more close
minded than regular people.
- Alex Chiu

Time is generally the best doctor.
- Ovid

We approach people the same way we approach our cars.
We take the poor kid to a doctor and ask,
What's wrong with him, how much will it cost,
and when can I pick him up?
- James Hillman

I was always shocked when I went to the doctor's office
and they did my X-ray and didn't find that I had eight
more ribs than I should have or that my blood was the color green.
- Nicolas Cage

I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately.
Ring the nearest golf course.
- Groucho Marx

You may not be able to read a doctor's handwriting and prescription,
but you'll notice his bills are neatly typewritten.
- Earl Wilson

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.
- Erma Bombeck

I went to the doctor and he said I had acute appendicitis,
and I said compared to who?
- Jay London

When I told my doctor I couldn't afford an operation,
he offered to touch-up my X-rays.
- Henny Youngman

So I went and visited a doctor and he diagnosed me with reactive arthritis.
- Daniel Johns

My mother raised three children on her own and my dad
was a doctor working 16 hours a day.
- Christopher Meloni

I often look at a lot of Doctor Who stuff that's about now,
which no one has approached me about.
- Sarah Sutton

Towards the end of 2003 it was hard to get through training -
and the darkest point was when a doctor told me there
was a possibility I could end up in a wheelchair.
- Jonah Lomu

The idea of winning a doctor's degree gradually assumed
the aspect of a great moral struggle,
and the moral fight possessed immense attraction for me.
- Elizabeth Blackwell

I wanted to be a doctor when I was a kid,
but I started doing theater in high school because it was a requirement.
At first, I was completely irritated.
But I ended up loving it.
- Sophia Bush

Joy, temperance, and repose, slam the door on the doctor's nose.
- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

I play a recurring role for a character named Doctor Imo.
I assist the villain and show up from time to time.
- Keir Dullea

Hospice means end-of-life care.
The admission ticket is a diagnosis from a doctor that
you have six months or less to live.
- Eleanor Clift

If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live,
I wouldn't brood.
I'd type a little faster.
- Isaac Asimov

It was lovely to do The Knock because I haven't done
anything really significant since Doctor Who.
- Colin Baker

The doctor must have put my pacemaker in wrong.
Every time my husband kisses me, the garage door goes up.
- Minnie Pearl

I wanted to do everything.
I wanted to be a pilot.
I wanted to be a secret agent.
I wanted to be a fireman and a doctor,
all that.
So I related that through movies and stuff.
- Josh Holloway

Presenting statues of honor to reporters for covering
an earthquake is like presenting a first prize to a
doctor for performing surgery.
- Phil Donahue

I like that totally mixed up kind of eclectic group
of personal props and bits of costume and I think the
fun of doing that is where I was very lucky with Doctor Who.
- Lalla Ward

I have many times thought I did the wrong thing,
but the reason was not to be a medical doctor -
it was just to have the information.
But then, maybe I was wrong, I don't know.
- Lennart Nilsson

The more ignorant, reckless and thoughtless a doctor is,
the higher his reputation soars even amongst powerful princes.
- Desiderius Erasmus

Even if the doctor does not give you a year,
even if he hesitates about a month, make one brave
push and see what can be accomplished in a week.
- Robert Louis Stevenson

By the time we went to Doctor Simon I think Barney
had been totally disabled for at least six months.
- Betty Hill

I am living in Norway, where I am under the care of
the best cancer doctor in Norway and I can be closer to my family.
- Grete Waitz

A wise doctor does not mutter incantations over a sore that needs the knife.
- Sophocles

It's kind of ironic that if I get my Ph.D.,
I'll be a real doctor.
- Marcia Cross

The doctor's name was Sylvia.
I told her she'd have a problem with me because Sylvia was my mother's name.
- Paul Lynde

No young doctor nowadays can hope for work as exciting and rewarding.
- Alice Hamilton

Now when you hates you shrinks up inside and gets littler
and you squeezes your heart tight and you stays so
mad with peoples you feels sick all the time like you needs the doctor.
- Margaret Walker

When the BBC decided to bring Doctor Who back as a
feature film a few years ago,
one national newspaper ran a poll to ask its readers
who should be the new Doctor,
and I topped it.
- Simon Callow

I could never play the ingenue, the girl next door
or the very successful young doctor.
That would be a bore.
- Jennifer Jason Leigh

All my Doctor's said I should become a model.
- Niki Taylor

My parents told me I would become a doctor and then
in my spare time I would become a concert pianist.
So, both my day job and my spare time were sort of taken care of.
- Amy Tan

Trust:
Perhaps you trust your doctor,
your lawyer, your boss - perhaps not.
Perhaps you trust in a "Higher Power" - perhaps you don't.
Trust is something that we become aware of in unusual situations,
such as a once-in-a-lifetime ride on a zip-line,
but most of the time, we become oblivious
to the trust we have, or don't have.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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