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I'm getting positive feedback for my acting so we'll
by Johnny Vegas

I'm getting positive feedback for my acting so we'll
see if any other interesting parts come up.
- Johnny Vegas

It is easy for me to love myself, but for ladies to
do it is another question altogether.
- Johnny Vegas

I used to be good with kids, but as I get older,
I'm grumpy and terrible with them.
As for doing a gig at a 6-year old's birthday party,
you couldn't pay me enough.
- Johnny Vegas

You can't be a proper comic unless you've been out
on stage and felt the fear.
- Johnny Vegas

 

My work's never been accepted by my family,
but it's something I'll always carry on with.
- Johnny Vegas

You can sway an audience if you win the women over.
The gentlemen will follow 'cause they can be so foolish like that at times,
they are easily led.
- Johnny Vegas

Had I become a priest, the sermons would've been electric!
- Johnny Vegas

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I use very few muscles at the best of times.
- Johnny Vegas

We all have days where we can't pronounce things or
give it the emotion it deserves.
- Johnny Vegas

We had a week off in the middle of shooting,
but as soon as everyone stopped, we all went down with
six different types of flu and other unmentionable diseases.
- Johnny Vegas

My forte is playing drunks down the ages.
When my agent rings me about a role,
I don't ask what the part is,
but what century it's in.
- Johnny Vegas

Up North you are holding your own.
Everyone considers themselves a comedian.
- Johnny Vegas

I actually enjoy being heckled; it keeps it interesting,
and I think it is a nice feeling for people once they have left the show.
- Johnny Vegas

I've got little ankles and a bit of a belly,
so it makes me look rather an egg on legs.
- Johnny Vegas

With stand-up you've just got that one chance.
Audiences can be quite fickle.
- Johnny Vegas

When I wasn't as attractive as I am now,
I suffered at the hands of cruel children and their
taunts until I realised that confidence and a bit of
aesthetic care can overcome that.
- Johnny Vegas

This autocue was obviously written for someone else
and I've been brought in at the last minute.
- Johnny Vegas

There's lots of stuff about me being a fan of Cliff but not being gay.
Which suggests that he is, but he's not.
Anyway, this is Channel 4, let their lawyers sort it out.
- Johnny Vegas

Baldness is visually enough of a stigma as it is without
a big sweaty bloke on stage pointing it out.
- Johnny Vegas

I also want to return to doing stand-up.
I've become frightened of live audiences.
This is a really telling sign that I need to go back
on the comedy circuit again.
- Johnny Vegas

I've got too much respect for stand-ups to call myself one.
- Johnny Vegas

If an original piece of wardrobe came up from Star Wars,
I'd probably spend a lot of money on it.
- Johnny Vegas

For the greater good, I thought I should be a spiritual
leader for people for some reason.
- Johnny Vegas

They look outside the windows of their apartment in
town and realize they're not living in a terrace anymore.
This is a room full of dreamers who like to go to London for a day.
- Johnny Vegas

I always feel like an interloper when I do serious drama.
It's my own paranoia.
- Johnny Vegas

There's this idea that it has to be made in London.
But we've got everything up here, and if you've got
comics who are gifted because of where they're from,
you shouldn't drag them away from that natural resource.
- Johnny Vegas

I trained to be a priest - started to.
I went to seminary school when I was 11.
I wanted to be a priest, but when they told me I could never have sex,
not even on my birthday, I changed my mind.
- Johnny Vegas

Success is getting what you want;
happiness is wanting what you get.
- Dale Carnegie

I suppose leadership at one time meant muscles;
but today it means getting along with people.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Do not think that love,
in order to be genuine,
has to be extraordinary.
What we need is to love without getting tired.
- Mother Teresa

What people often mean by getting rid of conflict
is getting rid of diversity,
and it is of the utmost importance
that these should not be considered the same.
- M. P. Follett

The secret of getting ahead is getting started.
The secret of getting started is
breaking your complex overwhelming tasks
into small manageable tasks,
and starting on the first one.
- Mark Twain

You create stress in your life by getting angry,
and you can instantly remove
that stress by granting forgiveness.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Besides the noble art of getting things done,
there is the noble art of leaving things undone.
The wisdom of life consists in the elimination of non-essentials.
- Lin Yutang

We tend to forget that happiness doesn't
come as a result of getting something we don't have,
but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have.
- Frederick Koenig

When I am getting ready to reason with a man,
I spend one-third of my time thinking about myself
and what I am going to say
and two-thirds about him and what he is going to say.
- Abraham Lincoln

What you don't do daily, you probably won't do weekly either.
What you make a habit of putting-off
just keeps getting pushed away again and again.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Remember that the happiest people
are not those getting more, but those giving more.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

There is nothing with which every man is so afraid
as getting to know how enormously much
he is capable of doing and becoming.
- Soren Kierkegaard

Motivation is the art of getting people to do
what you want them to do because they want to do it.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

Remember that not getting what you want
is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.
- Tenzin Gyatso, the 14th Dalai Lama

The indispensable first step to getting
the things you want out of life is this:
Decide what you want.
- Ben Stein

Not getting what you want
is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.
- Dalai Lama

Happiness isn't at the end of the rainbow.
Happiness is at the beginning of the rainbow.
Following the rainbow is happiness,
not getting to the end of it.
- Werner Erhard

When you keep getting the wrong answers,
try asking better questions.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Every day in every way I am getting better and better.
- Anonymous

Many important things shouldn't be done half-way.
Think of getting married, having children,
starting a business, changing your career.
There are times to gather your courage
and make the leap, the whole leap.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

When we hate our enemies, we are
giving them power over us:
power over our sleep, our appetites,
our blood pressure, our health, and our happiness.
Our enemies would dance with joy if only
they knew how they were worrying us,
lacerating us, and getting even with us!
Our hate is not hurting them at all,
but our hate is turning our own days
and nights into a hellish turmoil.
- Dale Carnegie

Getting old is a fascination thing.
The older you get, the older you want to get.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

We are always getting ready to live but never living.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Like everyone else who makes the mistake of getting older,
I begin each day with coffee and obituaries.
- Bill Cosby

In a bad marriage, friends are the invisible glue.
If we have enough friends, we may go on for years,
intending to leave, talking about leaving -
instead of actually getting up and leaving.
- Erica Jong

I know I am getting better at golf because I am hitting fewer spectators.
- Gerald R. Ford

It's not the having, it's the getting.
- Charles Spurgeon

Getting and spending, we lay waste our powers.
- William Wordsworth

"Think simple" as my old master used to say -
meaning reduce the whole of its parts
into the simplest terms,
getting back to first principles.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

Getting in touch with your true self must be your first priority.
- Tom Hopkins

Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find
a woman I don't like and give her a house.
- Lewis Grizzard

The secret of getting things done is to act!
- Dante Alighieri

Wisdom is the quality that keeps you from getting into
situations where you need it.
- Doug Larson

You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.
- Bob Hope

Getting information off the Internet is like taking
a drink from a fire hydrant.
- Mitchell Kapor

Pain is a difficult companion. There's no getting around that.
But, if pain is to be a companion, searching and discovering
your own best ways to travel with that pain
will lead you to the joy that you long to have.
They are your paths, your ways and while my experience
and the experiences of others may inspire you,
ultimately it will be the choices you discover
and make for yourself that lead you to certain joy
in the midst of your challenges.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

What's the subject of life - to get rich? All of those
fellows out there getting rich could be dancing around
the real subject of life.
- Paul A. Volcker

And you know, the baby boomers are getting older,
and those off the rack clothes are just not fitting right any longer,
and so, tailor-made suits are coming back into fashion.
- Amy Irving

Success is falling nine times and getting up ten.
- Jon Bon Jovi

Getting divorced just because you don't love a man
is almost as silly as getting married just because you do.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor

The purpose of getting power is to be able to give it away.
- Aneurin Bevan

There is no more fatal blunderer than he who consumes
the greater part of his life getting his living.
- Henry David Thoreau

Going to work for a large company is like getting on a train.
Are you going sixty miles an hour or is the train going
sixty miles an hour and you're just sitting still?
- J. Paul Getty

Getting fired is nature's way to telling you
that you had the wrong job in the first place.
- Hal Lancaster


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- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

 


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