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All the libel lawyers will tell you there's no libel any more,
by Ian Hislop

All the libel lawyers will tell you there's no libel any more,
that everyone's given up.
- Ian Hislop

Related topics: Legal

This job certainly doesn't win you a huge amount of friends,
I accept that, but it is very enjoyable,
and deep down I think it's probably quite a worthwhile job.
- Ian Hislop

I've seen the Pokemon movie, which is probably the
worst movie ever made on any subject ever.
- Ian Hislop

There's an awful lot of terrible television which I could do,
but I mostly stick to Have I Got News for You.
- Ian Hislop

 

No, there are no hard and fast rules about sources,
no printed booklet to help journalists through.
- Ian Hislop

Internet journalism is not a world we know very well at all.
It's conducted more on the screen and less in bars,
which makes it rather less useful for getting stories
about people throwing up over one another,
which is what one's after.
- Ian Hislop

They may well say not only is this not true,
but I will put in an injunction to prevent publication.
No, stories don't go in unless I'm convinced by the
people who write them that they're true.
And if I'm wrong, then so be it.
- Ian Hislop

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If you call your opponent a politician,
it's grounds for libel.
- Mark Russell

The only rules comedy can tolerate are those of taste,
and the only limitations those of libel.
- James Thurber

Too many of us look upon Americans as dollar chasers.
This is a cruel libel, even if it is reiterated
thoughtlessly by the Americans themselves.
- Albert Einstein

I mean, in some cases with libel laws,
you know, they can write things about people who have no course of action,
because they can't afford to take legal action against them.
- Elton John

I've stopped caring about skeptics, but if they libel
or defame me they will end up in court.
- Uri Geller

There are so many exceptions to free speech:
child pornography,
cross burning, libel, fighting words.
- Cliff Stearns

The problem is that in our country, they make it almost
impossible for politicians to win anything.
In England it's easier to win a libel suit.
- Rand Paul

Wart hogs should sue for libel.
It is a terrible name and they are fine fellows and
devoted family men and it is rare to see one by himself;
the little woman and the kiddies are usually close at hand.
- Ilka Chase

Libel actions, when we look at them in perspective,
are an ornament of a civilized society.
They have replaced, after all, at least in most cases,
a resort to weapons in defense of a reputation.
- Henry Anatole Grunwald

It is better, however, for his own reputation that
the story-teller should risk a few actions for libel
on account of these unfortunate coincidences than that
he should adopt the melancholy device of using blanks or asterisks.
- James Payn

No other country in the world gives protection like that,
but it is not absolute protection.
People sometimes meet that high burden and win libel suits,
and in those cases I think they ought to win.
- Floyd Abrams

When public men indulge themselves in abuse,
when they deny others a fair trial, when they resort
to innuendo and insinuation,
to libel, scandal, and suspicion, then our democratic society is outraged,
and democracy is baffled.
- J. William Fulbright

People are getting smarter nowadays;
they are letting lawyers,
instead of their conscience, be their guide.
- Will Rogers

Lawyers, I suppose, were children once.
- Charles Lamb

Lawyers are the first refuge of the incompetent.
- Aaron Allston

It costs a lot to sue a magazine, and it's too bad
that we don't have a system where the losing team has
to pay the winning team's lawyers.
- Carol Burnett

The only people who benefit from lawsuits are lawyers.
I think we made a couple of them rich.
- Gavin Rossdale

The trouble with law is lawyers.
- Clarence Darrow

Unfortunately, what many people forget is that judges
are just lawyers in robes.
- Tammy Bruce

Discourage litigation.
Persuade your neighbors to compromise whenever you can.
As a peacemaker the lawyer has
superior opportunity of being a good man.
There will still be business enough.
- Abraham Lincoln

Doctors are just the same as lawyers;
the only difference is that lawyers merely rob you,
whereas doctors rob you and kill you too.
- Anton Chekhov

99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
- Anonymous

Lawyers are the only persons in whom ignorance of the law is not punished.
- Jeremy Bentham

People do not win people fights.
Lawyers do.
- Norman Ralph Augustine

If the laws could speak for themselves,
they would complain of the lawyers in the first place.
- Lord Halifax

As for lawyers, it's more fun to play one than to be one.
- Sam Waterston

I wouldn't pretend to tell you we don't pay our lawyers well.
- Jay Alan Sekulow

As a rule lawyers tend to want to do whatever they can to win.
- Bill Williams

Cagey trial lawyers have figured out there's a pretty
good likelihood their case -
no matter what its merit -
will literally get its day in court because of favorable judges.
- Dennis Hastert

Lawyers spend a great deal of their time shoveling smoke.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

To some lawyers, all facts are created equal.
- Felix Frankfurter

We are led by lawyers who do not understand either
technology or balance sheets.
- Thomas Friedman

Now record companies are run by lawyers and accountants.
The shift from the one to the other was definitely
related to when the takes started to get big.
- David Crosby

A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats.
- Benjamin Franklin

Of course I've got lawyers.
They are like nuclear weapons, I've got em 'cause everyone else has.
But as soon as you use them they screw everything up.
- Danny DeVito

The only real lawyers are trial lawyers,
and trial lawyers try cases to juries.
- Clarence Darrow

Lawyers are predators in grey worsted.
- Tom Holt

I think the lawyers are such incredible actors.
Can you imagine the performance they have to do every day?
- Monica Bellucci

There aren't more lady songwriters for the same reason
that there aren't more lady doctors or lady accountants or lady lawyers;
not enough women have the time for careers.
- Dorothy Fields

Sadly the job security of lawyers has been ruined,
so they are less willing to defend political defendants.
- Shirin Ebadi

I come from a profession which has suffered greatly
because of the lack of civility.
Lawyers treat each other poorly and it has come home to haunt them.
The public will not tolerate a lack of civility.
- James E. Rogers

The only way you can beat the lawyers is to die with nothing.
- Will Rogers

Government lawyers have a duty to disclose evidence
of wrongdoing in the government.
- Ken Starr

Lawyers didn't seriously get involved in the Watergate
stories until quite late,
when we realized we were on to something.
- Bob Woodward

The Nixon years were trying.
They honed my judgment for everything I did later on.
The experience also illustrated for me the importance
of training young lawyers properly.
- Fred F. Fielding

It is unfair to believe everything we hear about lawyers,
some of it might not be true.
- Gerald F. Lieberman

Lawyers have a dangerous job in Iran.
- Shirin Ebadi

The only difference between doctors and lawyers is
that lawyers merely rob you,
whereas doctors rob you and kill you,
too.
- Anton Chekhov

Our lawyers had their chat with the Supreme Court Justice,
and promised to repast the chat to other members of
the Supreme Court to find out whether they wanted to hear us out.
- Dashiell Hammett

Lawyers (are) operators of the toll bridge across which
anyone in search of justice has to pass.
- Jane Bryant Quinn

Young lawyers attend the courts, not because they have business there,
but because they have no business.
- Washington Irving

Drugs are in every walk of life - doctors,
lawyers, preachers, the guy who works for IBM,
teenagers on the street, teenagers in school.
- Smokey Robinson

Doctors are the same as lawyers; the only difference
is that lawyers merely rob you,
whereas doctors rob you and kill you too.
- Anton Chekhov

There's lots of stuff about me being a fan of Cliff but not being gay.
Which suggests that he is, but he's not.
Anyway, this is Channel 4, let their lawyers sort it out.
- Johnny Vegas

A lot of lawyers are set to tell me that it's not my fault I like to eat.
- Neil Cavuto

The question arises whether all lawyers are the same.
This is like asking whether everything that gets into a sewer is garbage.
- Florynce R. Kennedy

Lawyers know how to take isolated complaints in a divorce
case and build them into one big one.
- Hedy Lamarr

If there were no bad people, there would be no good lawyers.
- Charles Dickens

Reduce the number of lawyers.
They are like beavers - they get in the middle of the stream and dam it up.
- Donald Rumsfeld

There are some lawyers who think of themselves as basically
instruments of whoever their clients are,
and they pride themselves on their professional craft.
- Cass Sunstein

Man, I just feel blessed...
I was in a situation where the only way I could come
out of it was by putting my faith in God.
No matter how good my lawyers were, no matter how much celebrity I had,
everything was just stacked up against me.
- Puff Daddy

I was trained to be an actor, not a star.
I was trained to play roles, not to deal with fame
and agents and lawyers and the press.
- Gene Hackman

We were just a one-room bookstore; we didn't have any money for lawyers.
- Lawrence Ferlinghetti

Lawyers claim that their clients have been grossly mistreated,
which is what criminal defense lawyers are paid to do.
- Kenneth Starr


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