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The man who says he is willing to meet you halfway
by Laurence J. Peter

The man who says he is willing to meet you halfway
is usually a poor judge of distance.
- Laurence J. Peter

Related topics: Cynical

Speak when you are angry -
and you will make the best speech you'll ever regret.
- Laurence J. Peter PHOTO

There are two kinds of failures:
those who thought and never did,
and those who did and never thought.
- Laurence J. Peter

Facts are stubborn things,
but statistics are more pliable.
- Laurence J. Peter

 

If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.
- Laurence J. Peter

You can always tell a real friend: when you've made
a fool of yourself he doesn't feel you've done a permanent job.
- Laurence J. Peter

Everyone rises to their level of incompetence.
- Laurence J. Peter

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Originality is the fine art of remembering what you
hear but forgetting where you heard it.
- Laurence J. Peter

Against logic there is no armor like ignorance.
- Laurence J. Peter

Work is accomplished by those employees who have not
yet reached their level of incompetence.
- Laurence J. Peter

Education is a method whereby
one acquires a higher grade of prejudices.
- Laurence J. Peter

An economist is an expert who will know tomorrow why
the things he predicted yesterday didn't happen today.
- Laurence J. Peter

Heredity is what sets the parents of a teenager wondering about each other.
- Laurence J. Peter

The great question is not whether you have failed,
but whether you are content with failure.
- Laurence J. Peter

Some problems are so complex that you have to be highly
intelligent and well informed just to be undecided about them.
- Laurence J. Peter

Every girl should use what Mother Nature gave her before
Father Time takes it away.
- Laurence J. Peter

Equal opportunity means everyone will have a fair chance at being incompetent.
- Laurence J. Peter

Competence, like truth, beauty, and contact lenses,
is in the eye of the beholder.
- Laurence J. Peter

Nobody can be perfect unless he admits his faults,
but if he has faults how can he be perfect?
- Laurence J. Peter

A man convinced against his will is not convinced.
- Laurence J. Peter

America is a country that doesn't know where it is
going but is determined to set a speed record getting there.
- Laurence J. Peter

There are two kinds of egotists: Those who admit it,
and the rest of us.
- Laurence J. Peter

Men now monopolize the upper levels...
depriving women of their rightful share of opportunities for incompetence.
- Laurence J. Peter

Committees have become so important nowadays that subcommittees
have to be appointed to do the work.
- Laurence J. Peter

Psychiatry enables us to correct our faults by confessing
our parents' shortcomings.
- Laurence J. Peter

A pessimist is a man who looks both ways when he crosses the street.
- Laurence J. Peter

A man doesn't know what he knows until he knows what he doesn't know.
- Laurence J. Peter

Television has changed the American child from an irresistable
force to an immovable object.
- Laurence J. Peter

Make three correct guesses consecutively and you will
establish a reputation as an expert.
- Laurence J. Peter

Democracy is a process by which people are free to
choose the man who will get the blame.
- Laurence J. Peter

Early to bed, early to rise, work like hell,
and advertise.
- Laurence J. Peter

The best intelligence test is what we do with our leisure.
- Laurence J. Peter

If a cluttered desk is the sign of a cluttered mind,
what is the significance of a clean desk?
- Laurence J. Peter

Expert: a man who makes three correct guesses consecutively.
- Laurence J. Peter

Slump, and the world slumps with you.
Push, and you push alone.
- Laurence J. Peter

You can't cross the sea merely by standing and staring at the water.
Don't let yourself indulge in vain wishes.
- Laurence J. Peter

When in doubt or danger, run in circles,
scream and shout.
- Laurence J. Peter

Going to church doesn't make you any more a Christian
than going to the garage makes you a car.
- Laurence J. Peter

Don't believe in miracles - depend on them.
- Laurence J. Peter

In a hierarchy, every employee tends to rise to his level of incompetence.
- Laurence J. Peter

As a matter of fact is an expression that precedes
many an expression that isn't.
- Laurence J. Peter

A censor is an expert in cutting remarks.
A censor is a man who knows more than he thinks you ought to.
- Laurence J. Peter

America is a land of taxation that was founded to avoid taxation.
- Laurence J. Peter

Fortune knocks but once, but misfortune has much more patience.
- Laurence J. Peter

An intelligence test sometimes shows a man how smart
he would have been not to have taken it.
- Laurence J. Peter

If you don't know where you're going,
you will probably end up somewhere else.
- Laurence J. Peter

Bureaucracy defends the status quo long past the time
when the quo has lost its status.
- Laurence J. Peter

It's better to have loved and lost than to have to
do forty pounds of laundry a week.
- Laurence J. Peter

The seaman tells stories of winds, the ploughman of bulls;
the soldier details his wounds,
the shepherd his sheep.
- Laurence J. Peter

Talent is God-given; be humble.
Fame is man-given; be thankful.
Conceit is self-given; be careful.
- John Wooden

Every child comes with the message
that God is not yet discouraged of man.
- Rabindranath Tagore

All things share the same breath -
the beast, the tree, the man...
the air shares its spirit with all the life it supports.
- Chief Seattle (attributed)

The wise man in the storm prays God,
not for safety from danger,
but for deliverance from fear.
It is the storm within which endangers him,
not the storm without.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

The wise man does not lay up his own treasures.
The more he gives to others, the more he has for his own.
- Lao Tzu

The full measure of a man is
not to be found in the man himself,
but in the colors and textures that
come alive in others because of him.
- Albert Schweitzer

Man is least himself when he talks in his own person.
Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.
- Oscar Wilde

Adventure is not outside man; it is within.
- George Eliot

Circumstance does not make the man: it reveals him to himself.
- James Allen

Nearly all men can stand adversity,
but if you want to test a man's character, give him power.
- Abraham Lincoln

If a man is called to be a street sweeper,
he should sweep streets even as Michelangelo painted,
or Beethoven composed music, or Shakespeare wrote poetry.
He should sweep streets so well that all the hosts
of heaven and earth will pause to say,
here lived a great street sweeper who did his job well.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

Two things a man should never be angry at:
what he can help,
and what he cannot help.
- Thomas Fuller

The first question which the priest and the Levite asked was:
"If I stop to help this man, what will happen to me?"
But... the good Samaritan reversed the question:
"If I do not stop to help this man, what will happen to him?"
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

We who lived in concentration camps can remember the men
who walked through the huts comforting others,
giving away their last piece of bread...
They offer sufficient proof that everything
can be taken from a man but one thing:
to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances,
to choose one's own way.
- Viktor E. Frankl

Non-violence means avoiding not only external physical violence
but also internal violence of spirit.
You not only refuse to shoot a man,
but you refuse to hate him.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

The ultimate test of a man's conscience
may be his willingness to sacrifice something today
for future generations whose words of thanks will not be heard.
- Gaylord Nelson

If a man does his best, what else is there?
- George S. Patton

When I am getting ready to reason with a man,
I spend one-third of my time thinking about myself
and what I am going to say
and two-thirds about him and what he is going to say.
- Abraham Lincoln

Dear Father in heaven, I'm not a praying man,
but if you're up there and you can hear me ...
show me the way... show me the way.
- It's a Wonderful Life (1946 movie)

If a man loses pace with his companions,
perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer.
Let him step to the music which he hears,
however measured or far away.
- Henry David Thoreau

Anger is a killing thing:
it kills the man who angers,
for each rage leaves him less than he had been before -
it takes something from him.
- Louis L'Amour

Man lives freely only by his readiness to die, if need be,
at the hands of his brother, never by killing him.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi


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