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If the shoe fits, it is probably worn out. ...
by Craig Bruce

If the shoe fits, it is probably worn out.
- Craig Bruce

It's hardware that makes a machine fast.
It's software that makes a fast machine slow.
- Craig Bruce

The difference between being able to understand something
and inventing it in the first place...
is called genius.
- Craig Bruce

When you talk to yourself, at least you know that someone is listening.
- Craig Bruce


It's funny how most activists are pacifists.
- Craig Bruce

Geez, all that money we waste on space exploration;
just think how many bombs that would buy!
- Craig Bruce

Yeah, computers are going to take over the programming
business because they have become so fast recently
that they can solve the Halting Problem in five seconds flat.
- Craig Bruce

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Don't judge a book by its thickness either.
- Craig Bruce

The world is real.
Consciousness is the illusion.
- Craig Bruce

When anarchy is declared, the first thing we do,
let's kill all the anarchists.
- Craig Bruce

From each according to his ability, to each according to his ability.
- Craig Bruce

Don't trust anyone who has been in school for the past 24 consecutive years.
- Craig Bruce

Something is always simple until you try it.
- Craig Bruce

If I gave a damn what other people think of me,
I would be more like other people.
- Craig Bruce

The people who actually do things always suffer the
slings and arrows of those who don't.
- Craig Bruce

My to-do list is so long that it doesn't have an end;
it has an event horizon.
- Craig Bruce

Never underestimate the power of a simple tool.
- Craig Bruce

Fighting a war on terrorism is like fighting against crime.
We can never hope to eradicate crime,
so we shouldn't bother fighting it.
- Craig Bruce

Time is a resource whose supply is inversely proportional to its demand.
- Craig Bruce

Think Tank, noun: The shower.
- Craig Bruce

Whoever invented double clicking should be shot in the head!
- Craig Bruce

Things always look better when you haven't seen them.
- Craig Bruce

It's funny how social activists usually protest against
the only things that have a credible chance of achieving the activists' goals.
- Craig Bruce

Now is the time for all good men to run like hell.
- Craig Bruce

It's easy to idealize someone that you don't know.
- Craig Bruce

The only people I've ever heard saying that disagreeing with Bush,
Cheney and Rumsfeld is un-American or treasonous are
people who disagree with Bush,
Cheney and Rumsfeld.
- Craig Bruce

The only thing that is obscene is censorship.
- Craig Bruce

Anything on paper is obsolete!
- Craig Bruce

Temporary solutions often become permanent problems.
- Craig Bruce

You usually have to wait for that which is worth waiting for.
- Craig Bruce

Supermarket automatic doors open for me;
I am.
- Craig Bruce

Liberalism is financed by the dividends from Conservatism.
- Craig Bruce

When shooting in the dark, it is a good idea to use a machine gun.
- Craig Bruce

When you are finished with it, put it back in the first
place that you looked for it.
- Craig Bruce

Nothing surpasses the beauty and elegance of a bad idea.
- Craig Bruce

In order for a man to be truly evil,
he must be a woman.
- Craig Bruce

Live every day as if it is your last,
and you'll be correct sooner than you otherwise would be.
- Craig Bruce

Silence is a statement that is open to gross misinterpretation.
- Craig Bruce

I am woman, hear me bitch.
- Craig Bruce

I think; therefore, I am the center of the universe.
- Craig Bruce

The Thought Police: To censor and protect.
- Craig Bruce

When trying to locate something, search your mind first.
- Craig Bruce

Even IBM can't stand in the way of progress...
for more than a decade.
- Craig Bruce

Never question the relevance of truth,
but always question the truth of relevance.
- Craig Bruce

1 + 1 = 2.
Everything else is derived.
- Craig Bruce

'Programming' is a four-letter word.
- Craig Bruce

The entire universe is working against me.
I can't believe the entire universe could be that foolish!
- Craig Bruce

I wonder if those people shown protesting the deployment
of nuclear weapons to western Europe during the Reagan
era are feeling appropriately stupid today.
'Please don't take away our precious Soviet Union!
- We demand the annihilation of all life on Earth!'
- Craig Bruce

Why are people unemployed? Because there is no work.
Why is there no work? Because people are not buying products and services.
Why are people not buying products and services? Because they have no money.
Why do people have no money? Because they are unemployed.
- Craig Bruce

It's a bit odd that nobody seems to be using the correct
technical term to describe organized Islamic terrorists.
They are not a faction of a religion or a social movement.
They are a cult.
A suicide cult.
- Craig Bruce

Organizations like the ACLU fought and won the good
fight back in the 1960's,
but it's clear that nowadays they've run out of useful
things to do since they now spend most of their time
defending the scum of the Earth from getting what they rightly deserve.
- Craig Bruce

It isn't the mountain ahead that wears you out;
it's the grain of sand in your shoe.
- Robert W. Service

For want of a nail the shoe was lost;
for want of a shoe the horse was lost;
and for want of a horse the rider was lost.
- Benjamin Franklin

The shoe that fits one person pinches another;
there is no recipe for living that suits all cases.
- Carl Jung

Spring is when you feel like whistling even with a shoe full of slush.
- Doug Larson

If a man's fortune does not fit him,
it is like the shoe in the story; if too large it trips him up,
if too small it pinches him.
- Horace

So, I understand when they make a mistake and everyone
at home is throwing their shoe at the television set.
- Vanna White

Later the Administration wanted me to actually sell
all remaining surplus by running the War Assets Corporation.
I said I couldn't do it without some shoe leather.
- Stuart Symington

Stiletto, I look at it more as an attitude as opposed to a high-heeled shoe.
- Lita Ford

In the dressing room, I always put on my right shoe first.
Same thing for my right wristband.
- Mary Lou Retton

A work-room should be like an old shoe;
no matter how shabby,
it's better than a new one.
- Willa Cather

If the shoe doesn't fit, must we change the foot?
- Gloria Steinem

When I went back to visit my native Berlin after World War II,
I noticed that the only thing I really remembered from
my childhood Berlin days is the shoe store.
- Lukas Foss

So now I'm left with cigarettes, and I'm trying to
scrape that off my shoe and then I'll be done.
- Diane Lane

Sex and the City changed New York-New York's become a big shoe store now,
- Chris Noth

If you drag your shoe a bit those plastic spikes or
rubber spikes can be almost as bad as metal spikes.
- Bernhard Langer

There is no more unfortunate creature under the sun
than a fetishist who yearns for a woman's shoe and
has to settle for the whole woman.
- Karl Kraus

What spirit is so empty and blind, that it cannot recognize
the fact that the foot is more noble than the shoe,
and skin more beautiful than the garment with which it is clothed?
- Michelangelo

A vigorous temper is not altogether an evil.
Men who are easy as an old shoe are generally of little worth.
- Charles Spurgeon

If the shoe fits, it's too expensive.
- Adrienne Gusoff

Who will wear a shoe that hurts him,
because the shoe-maker tells him 'tis well made?
- Algernon Sydney

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