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There are two types of people in the world,
by Aaron Allston

There are two types of people in the world,
and I'm one of them.
- Aaron Allston

Lawyers are the first refuge of the incompetent.
- Aaron Allston

The principle of Sturgeon's Razor states that the simplest
answer to any problem is 90% crap.
- Aaron Allston

Feminism is sort of like God.
Many people profess to believe in it,
but no one seems to be able to define it to everyone's satisfaction.
- Aaron Allston

 

When all else fails, complicate matters.
- Aaron Allston

The analysis of the thing is not the thing itself.
- Aaron Allston

Definition of 'Free': You pay for it whether or not you elect to receive it.
- Aaron Allston

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I'm content to stand on tradition.
I'm even more content to wipe my feet on it.
- Aaron Allston

Where can I get some tat? I'd like to trade it in.
- Aaron Allston

Life is like an analogy.
- Aaron Allston

Violence is the first refuge of the violent.
- Aaron Allston

If you hack the Vatican server, have you tampered in God's domain?
- Aaron Allston

No one pays me to be nice.
- Aaron Allston

The difference between tragedy and comedy:
Tragedy is something awful happening to somebody else,
while comedy is something awful happening to somebody else.
- Aaron Allston

This would not be a problem if I were driving a snowplow.
- Aaron Allston

Any sufficiently badly-written science is indistinguishable from magic.
- Aaron Allston

Luck consists largely of hanging on by your fingernails
until things start to go your way.
- Aaron Allston

The way to a man's heart is through his chest.
- Aaron Allston

I really can't complain about actresses who get paid to be dumb.
Most of us can't get paid to be smart.
- Aaron Allston

There are only two ways to live your life.
One is as though nothing is a miracle.
The other is as though everything is a miracle.
- Albert Einstein

Every tomorrow has two handles.
We can take hold of it with the handle of anxiety
or the handle of faith.
- Henry Ward Beecher

There are two kinds of failures:
those who thought and never did,
and those who did and never thought.
- Laurence J. Peter

There are only two or three human stories,
and they go on repeating themselves as fiercely
as if they had never happened before.
- Willa Cather

When written in Chinese, the word "crisis"
is composed of two characters.
One represents danger and the other represents opportunity.
- John F. Kennedy

Two things a man should never be angry at:
what he can help,
and what he cannot help.
- Thomas Fuller

When I am getting ready to reason with a man,
I spend one-third of my time thinking about myself
and what I am going to say
and two-thirds about him and what he is going to say.
- Abraham Lincoln

Pride comes in two flavors -
be careful which you choose -
choose honor, not ego.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Winners must have two things:
definite goals and a burning desire to achieve them.
- Anonymous

Two little words that can make the difference: START NOW.
- Mary C. Crowley

I had three chairs in my house;
one for solitude, two for friendship, three for society.
- Henry David Thoreau

To live a satisfying life requires two steps...
1. Plan your life goals.
2. Act on your plan - every day.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

You can't cross a chasm in two small jumps.
- old proverb often attributed to David Lloyd George

There are two lasting bequests we can give our children
One is roots, the other is wings.
- Hodding Carter

People generally complain about only two things:
when they have less than yesterday,
and when they have less than their neighbor.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Pride comes in two flavors -
choose honor, not ego.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Unity can only be manifested by the Binary.
Unity itself and the idea of Unity are already two.
- The Buddha

As you grow older you will discover that you have two hands.
One for helping yourself, the other for helping others.
- Audrey Hepburn

A wise man hears one word and understands two.
- Yiddish Proverb

Don't be afraid to take a big step if one is indicated;
you can't cross a chasm in two small jumps.
- David Lloyd George

There are two things to aim at in life:
first, to get what you want,
and after that to to enjoy it.
- Logan Pearsall Smith

We have two ears and one mouth so that
we can listen twice as much as we speak.
- Epictetus

Cause and effect are two sides of one fact.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

There are only two mistakes one can make along the road to truth;
not going all the way, and not starting.
- The Buddha

The Two Great Lessons of Life: Choose Love & Trust God.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

There are two mistakes one can make along the road to truth
- not going all the way and not starting.
- The Buddha

Friendship is a single soul dwelling in two bodies.
- Aristotle

You can make more friends in two months
by becoming interested in other people
than you can in two years by trying
to get other people interested in you.
- Dale Carnegie

"I can forgive, but I cannot forget,"
is only another way of saying, I will not forgive.
Forgiveness ought to be like a canceled note -
torn in two, and burned up,
so that it never can be shown against one.
- Henry Ward Beecher

Love allows your beloved the freedom to be unlike you.
Attachment asks for conformity to your needs and desires.
Love imposes no demands.
Attachment expresses an overwhelming demand - "Make me feel whole."
Love expands beyond the limits of two people.
Attachment tries to exclude everything but two people.
- Deepak Chopra in The Path to Love

Life change comes about in two complementary ways -
the "aha" moment, which occurs in a flash of insight;
and the conscious redesigning of habitual behaviors,
which is a lifelong project.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Understanding is a two-way street.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

Friendship is a strong and habitual inclination in two persons
to promote the good and happiness of one another.
- Eustace Budgell

This communicating of a man's self to his friend
works two contrary effects;
for it redoubleth joys, and cutteth griefs in half.
- Francis Bacon

The meeting of two personalities is
like the contact of two chemical substances:
if there is any reaction, both are transformed.
- Carl Jung

Power is of two kinds. One is obtained by the fear of punishment
and the other by acts of love. Power based on love
is a thousand times more effective and permanent
then the one derived from fear of punishment.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Friendship is one mind in two bodies.
- Mencius

Friendship is not possible between two women
one of whom is very well dressed.
- Laurie Colwin

A great gift requires two people,
the giver and the receiver.
Think of a football pass -
skillfully catching the pass, the gift,
is fully as important, and difficult, as throwing it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Prejudice is a two-edged sword.
Like the steel sort of sword, it's very sharp, very useful,
and very dangerous if not properly mastered.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Sadness is but a wall between two gardens.
- Khalil Gibran

Love is a game that two can play and both win.
- Eva Gabor

We were given:
Two hands to hold.
Two legs to walk.
Two eyes to see.
Two ears to listen.
But why only one heart?
Because the other was given to someone else.
For us to find.
- Anonymous

All the Buddhas of all the ages have been
telling you a very simple fact:
Be - don't try to become.
Within these two words, be and becoming,
your whole life is contained.
Being is enlightenment, becoming is ignorance.
- Osho

Two souls with but a single thought,
Two hearts that beat as one.
- Friedrich Halm

The mind exists in time, in fact the mind is time;
it exists in the past and the future.
And remember, time consists of only two tenses,
the past and the future.
The present is not part of time,
the present is part of eternity.
- Osho

Having a child is surely the most beautifully irrational
act that two people in love can commit.
- Bill Cosby

Love is what makes two people
sit in the middle of a park bench
when there is plenty of room at both ends.
- Anonymous

This is the answer to all questions about relationship.
When two people sing their lives in harmony,
their lives are grand.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Give the right man two fishes and some bread,
and he will feed the world;
give the wrong man two fishes and some bread
and he will invent the fast-food fish sandwich.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Faith:
When you walk to the edge of all the light you have
and take that first step into the darkness of the unknown,
you must believe that one of two things will happen:
...
There will be something solid for you to stand upon,
or, you will be taught how to fly
- Patrick Overton - from his book of poems: The Leaning Tree, 1975
[Widely mis-attributed to Barbara J. Winter, Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, and others]

The heart of marriage is memories; and if the two of
you happen to have the same ones and can savor your reruns,
then your marriage is a gift from the gods.
- Bill Cosby


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- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

 


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