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The Vice-Presidency is sort of like the last cookie on the plate.
by Bill Vaughan

The Vice-Presidency is sort of like the last cookie on the plate.
Everybody insists he won't take it, but somebody always does.
- Bill Vaughan

Related topics: Politics

Suburbia is where the developer bulldozes out the trees,
then names the streets after them.
- Bill Vaughan

Youth is when you're allowed to stay up late on New Year's Eve.
Middle age is when you're forced to.
- Bill Vaughan

A real patriot is the fellow who gets a parking ticket
and rejoices that the system works.
- Bill Vaughan

 

Money won't buy happiness, but it will pay the salaries
of a large research staff to study the problem.
- Bill Vaughan

Muscles come and go; flab lasts.
- Bill Vaughan

Economists report that a college education adds many
thousands of dollars to a man's lifetime income -
which he then spends sending his son to college.
- Bill Vaughan

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To God, thy country, and thy friend be true.
- Bill Vaughan

The tax collector must love poor people,
he's creating so many of them.
- Bill Vaughan

The groundhog is like most other prophets;
it delivers its prediction and then disappears.
- Bill Vaughan

It would be nice if the poor were to get even half
of the money that is spent in studying them.
- Bill Vaughan

I'm an actor.
And I guess I've done so many movies I've achieved some high visibility.
But a star? I guess I still think of myself as kind of a worker ant.
- Bill Vaughan

Man is the animal that intends to shoot himself out
into interplanetary space,
after having given up on the problem of an efficient
way to get himself five miles to work and back each day.
- Bill Vaughan

We hope that, when the insects take over the world,
they will remember with gratitude how we took them
along on all our picnics.
- Bill Vaughan

An optimist stays up until midnight to see the new year in.
A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves.
- Bill Vaughan

If there is anything the nonconformist hates worse than a conformist,
it's another nonconformist who doesn't conform to the
prevailing standard of nonconformity.
- Bill Vaughan

In the game of life, it's a good idea to have a few early losses,
which relieves you of the pressure of trying to maintain an undefeated season.
- Bill Vaughan

A three year old child is a being who gets almost as
much fun out of a fifty-six dollar set of swings as
it does out of finding a small green worm.
- Bill Vaughan

Now that women are jockeys, baseball umpires,
atomic scientists, and business executives,
maybe someday they can master parallel parking.
- Bill Vaughan

People learn something every day, and a lot of times
it's that what they learned the day before was wrong.
- Bill Vaughan

Maybe the answer to Selective Service is to start everyone
off in the army and draft them for civilian life as needed.
- Bill Vaughan

By the time you're eighty years old you've learned everything.
You only have to remember it.
- Bill Vaughan

The whale is endangered, while the ant continues to do just fine.
- Bill Vaughan

The wonderful world of home appliances now makes it
possible to cook indoors with charcoal and outdoors with gas.
- Bill Vaughan

A citizen of America will cross the ocean to fight for democracy,
but won't cross the street to vote in a national election.
- Bill Vaughan

Old age has deformities enough of its own.
It should never add to them the deformity of vice.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

Old age adds to the respect due to virtue,
but it takes nothing from the contempt inspired by vice;
it whitens only the hair.
- Ira Gershwin

The worst vice of the solitary is the worship of his food.
- Cyril Connolly

Fast cars are my only vice.
- Michael Bay

The details are the very source of expression in architecture.
But we are caught in a vice between art and the bottom line.
- Arthur Erickson

The inherent vice of capitalism
is the unequal sharing of blessings;
the inherent virtue of socialism
is the equal sharing of miseries.
- Winston Churchill

I would remind you that extremism in the defense of liberty is no vice!
And let me remind you also that moderation in the pursuit of justice is no virtue.
- Barry Goldwater

As far as I'm concerned, I prefer
silent vice to ostentatious virtue.
- Albert Einstein

Our faith comes in moments; our vice is habitual.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Ignorance and a narrow education lay the foundation of vice,
and imitation and custom rear it up.
- Mary Astell

Vice, in its true light, is so deformed,
that it shocks us at first sight; and would hardly ever seduce us,
if it did not at first wear the mask of some virtue.
- Lord Chesterfield

This is the essential evil of vice, that it debases man.
- Edwin Hubbel Chapin

Is pride, the never-failing vice of fools.
- Alexander Pope

The foundation of empire is art and science.
Remove them or degrade them, and the empire is no more.
Empire follows art and not vice versa as Englishmen suppose.
- William Blake

Were there no desire there would be no virtue,
and because one man desires what another does not,
who shall say whether the child of his desire be Vice or Virtue?
- Edgar Rice Burroghs

A pacifist will often - at least nowadays -
be an internationalist and vice versa.
But history shows us that a pacifist need not think internationally.
- Christian Lous Lange

Nobody is surprised that women writers accurately represent
male characters over and over again,
no doubt because everybody knows that women understand
men much better than vice-versa.
- Peter Straub

Four years of Jimmy Carter gave us two titanic Reagan landslides,
peace and prosperity for eight blessed years -
and even a third term for his feckless vice president,
George H.W.
Bush.
- Ann Coulter

Under the leadership of President Bush and Vice President Cheney,
the United States has given up the moral high ground
that we used to occupy as an international leader.
- Marty Meehan

Vice came in always at the door of necessity,
not at the door of inclination.
- Daniel Defoe

What this country needs what every country needs occasionally
is a good hard bloody war to revive the vice of patriotism
on which its existence as a nation depends.
- Ambrose Bierce

The only vice that cannot be forgiven is hypocrisy.
The repentance of a hypocrite is itself hypocrisy.
- William Hazlitt

If vice and corruption prevail, liberty cannot subsist;
but if virtue have the advantage,
arbitrary power cannot be established.
- Algernon Sidney

After being sworn in to office, vice presidents have
usually been relegated to the sidelines,
where they just don't get to do very much.
- Mary Cheney

I think women can be as cruel as men,
and men as tender as women, and vice versa.
- Aaron Eckhart

The first step towards vice is to shroud innocent actions in mystery,
and whoever likes to conceal something sooner or later
has reason to conceal it.
- Jean Jacques Rousseau

Where the state begins, individual liberty ceases,
and vice versa.
- Mikhail Bakunin

The vice presidential candidate tends to be a bit of an afterthought.
- Mary Cheney

You can learn as much about the history from reading
about the present as you can vice versa,
that is learning about the present through history,
which is what I do for a living.
- Ken Burns

He that is good, will infallibly become better,
and he that is bad, will as certainly become worse;
for vice,
virtue and time are three things that never stand still.
- Charles Caleb Colton

To all the rest of his Absurdities, (for vice is always
unreasonable,) he adds one more,
who expects that Vertue from another which he won't practise himself.
- Mary Astell

I do adore food.
If I have any vice it's eating.
If I was told I could only eat one food for the rest of my life,
I could put up with sausage and mash forever.
- Colin Baker

There are many sham diamonds in this life which pass for real,
and vice versa.
- William Makepeace Thackeray

No vice is so bad as advice.
- Marie Dressler

The tongue may be employed about, and made to serve
all the purposes of vice,
in tempting and deceiving, in perjury and injustice.
- Joseph Butler

An actor who is good at comedy can also be very good at drama,
but not necessarily vice versa.
- Desi Arnaz

I'm the only American alive or dead who presided unhappily
over the removal of a vice president and a president.
- Alexander Haig

Virtue is defined to be mediocrity, of which either extreme is vice.
- Rutherford B. Hayes

What has the women's movement learned from Geraldine
Ferraro's candidacy for vice president? Never get married.
- Gloria Steinem

Food is my thing, I do not smoke or drink,
so food is my vice.
- Kathy Griffin

By vulgarity I mean that vice of civilization which
makes man ashamed of himself and his next of kin,
and pretend to be somebody else.
- Solomon Schechter

The disgrace of others often keeps tender minds from vice.
- Horace

Avarice is the vice of declining years.
- George Bancroft

Ambition is not a vice of little people.
- Michel de Montaigne

No one ever reached the worst of a vice at one leap.
- Juvenal

I don't doubt a number of those ballots,
of those votes that were cast for me,
probably were intended for Vice President Gore.
- Pat Buchanan


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