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I'm waiting for the time when I fail -
by Adrian Edmondson

I'm waiting for the time when I fail -
because we all fail -
and I'm ready,
I'll take up carpentry.
- Adrian Edmondson

It only works because we still amuse each other.
After we have been working with other people,
it is so refreshing to laugh unreservedly when we are back together again.
- Adrian Edmondson

A lot of people are obsessed with looking cool.
They feel they have to look after their image.
- Adrian Edmondson

It's definitely time to stop.
We're getting too old.
We both realised that the show wasn't as engaging as it used to be.
We were starting to look a bit ridiculous.
- Adrian Edmondson

 

From the stage I've seen people of all ages absolutely
roaring at really good toilet humour.
- Adrian Edmondson

Performers like Tommy Cooper, who are always getting things wrong,
are much more endearing than comedians who are sassy and smart.
- Adrian Edmondson

You're entering dangerous land when you start theorising about comedy.
- Adrian Edmondson

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Even though we work in the same field,
we have an intense private life away from our professional lives.
- Adrian Edmondson

We have never been strictly political,
only strictly funny.
- Adrian Edmondson

Most modern comedy is crap.
- Adrian Edmondson

I've always had a kind of visual eye,
and it was a pleasant exercise for that.
- Adrian Edmondson

We only have one agenda, which is to make 'em laugh their pants off.
Unless they are girls, of course, when it is to make
them laugh their bras off so we can get a quick look.
- Adrian Edmondson

We had so much fun in Ghana and they are really lovely people.
- Adrian Edmondson

On stage, we just want to generate hysteria.
We don't care about looking cool or posing.
- Adrian Edmondson

The most fun I ever have is sitting in with Rick writing,
and we laugh at our own jokes.
- Adrian Edmondson

I've never played a hero before so I jumped at the chance.
- Adrian Edmondson

Richie and Eddie couldn't exist without each other.
They're two halves of the same person.
- Adrian Edmondson

I remember once having to stop performing when I thought
an elderly man a few rows back from the front was actually
going to die because he was laughing so hard.
- Adrian Edmondson

People expect us to be different, but we're not.
We're very similar people, and it's because we're so
similar and close to each other that we make each other laugh -
in fact we make each other laugh more than we make anyone else laugh.
- Adrian Edmondson

I don't claim that our TV comedies are highbrow in anyway,
but I think there's a basis to them,
and that's why they're more popular than other TV comedies.
There's a basis of truth in them, a gut feeling.
- Adrian Edmondson

There is a lot of rubbish written about toilet humour -
people saying it is childish and pretending it is beneath them -
but there is no doubting the effectiveness of a really good willy gag.
- Adrian Edmondson

Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass...
It's about learning to Dance in the Rain.
- Vivian Greene

We must be willing to get rid of the life we've planned,
so as to have the life that is waiting for us.
The old skin has to be shed before the new one can come.
- Joseph Campbell

We must let go of the life we have planned,
so as to accept the one that is waiting for us.
- Joseph Campbell

If you spend your whole life waiting for the storm,
you'll never enjoy the sunshine.
- Morris West

The world is all gates, all opportunities,
strings of tension waiting to be struck.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

The world is more malleable than you think
and it's waiting for you to hammer it into shape.
- Bono

Without zest, what is life?
Just waiting for death?
- Osho

Life is lived in the waiting.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Make a conscious choice to live
a serene and stress-free life.
Stress is always waiting just outside your door
like a vicious wild-dog.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

You can't stay in your corner of the Forest waiting for others to come to you.
You have to go to them sometimes.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

The universe is full of magical things
patiently waiting for our wits to grow sharper.
- Eden Phillpotts

Our creator is the same and never changes
despite the names given Him by people here
and in all parts of the world.
Even if we gave Him no name at all,
He would still be there, within us,
waiting to give us good on this earth.
- George Washington Carver

When you follow your bliss, you put yourself on a kind of track
that has been there all the while waiting for you,
and the life you ought to be living is the one you are living.
When you can see that, you begin to meet people
who are in the field of your bliss,
and they open the doors to you.
I say, follow your bliss and don't be afraid,
and doors will open where you didn't know they were going to be.
If you follow your bliss,
doors will open for you that wouldn't have opened for anyone else.
- Joseph Campbell

Spirit is always waiting to rush into us,
but we are too full of worldly things.
It is like trying to pour fine wine into a cup filled with mud -
the wine is waiting, but the mud must be removed first.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Stress is always waiting
just outside your door
like a vicious wild-dog.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Might I perhaps win my wings?
I've been waiting for over 200 years now, sir,
and people ARE beginning to talk.
- It's a Wonderful Life (1946 movie)

Don't worry about that chair with a hole in the middle.
It's merely waiting to be reupholstered.
- the movie Casino Royale (1966)

I had a birthday one night on a farm we were shooting on.
I walked into the tent, and there were 150 people waiting for me,
all wearing masks of my face.
- Stephen Hopkins

Publishing a volume of verse is like dropping a rose
petal down the Grand Canyon and waiting for the echo.
- Don Marquis

The Internet is the most important single development
in the history of human communication since the invention of call waiting.
- Dave Barry

The Sweetest Strawberry:
A man traveling across a field encountered a tiger.
He fled, the tiger after him.
Coming to a precipice,
he caught hold of the root of a wild vine
and swung himself over the edge.
The tiger sniffed at him from above.
Trembling, the man looked down to where,
far below, another tiger was waiting to eat him.
Only the vine sustained him.
Two mice, one white and one black,
little by little started to gnaw away the vine.
The man then saw a luscious strawberry near him.
Grasping the vine with one hand,
he plucked the strawberry with the other.
How sweet it tasted.
- Zen Koan

If you were going to die soon and had only one phone call you could make,
who would you call and what would you say? And why are you waiting?
- Stephen Levine

I was standing in the schoolyard waiting for a child
when another mother came up to me.
Have you found work yet? she asked.
Or are you still just writing?
- Anne Tyler

I think it is important that you care about the characters,
and you are not just waiting for the next action sequence
but have a vested interested in what happens to them.
- Shawn Ashmore

We have dozens and dozens and dozens of judicial nominees
up there waiting and we have a court system that's
crying out for more judges.
- Joe Lockhart

Waiting is the great vocation of the dispossessed.
- Mary Gordon

I've heard every pie joke in the book.
I'm still waiting for an original one.
- Jason Biggs

You can think you've made it and yet the next day's
press will always be waiting for you,
the public will always ask more of you.
In short, you can always do better!
- Giorgio Armani

Waiting for the spark from heaven to fall.
- Matthew Arnold

If I became a philosopher, if I have so keenly sought
this fame for which I'm still waiting,
it's all been to seduce women basically.
- Jean-Paul Sartre

I'm waiting for them to make 'Thundercats'.
I would love to be Cheetara.
- Rachel McAdams

I saw the booster, not Sputnik, flying by,
and I said, maybe this is the way we should be going,
not just sitting back waiting for something to happen.
- Wally Schirra

Waiting is painful.
Forgetting is painful.
But not knowing which to do is the worse kind of suffering.
- Paulo Coelho

Conservatives and liberals alike have been waiting
for this moment for a third of a century.
- Michael Kinsley

When critics are waiting to pounce upon poetic style
on exactly the same grounds as if it were prose,
the poets tremble.
- John C. Ransom

I have to keep reminding myself that I am their mother.
Sometimes we are sitting at home and I feel like we
are waiting for our mom to come home.
- Ruby Wax

I was taught to think the next week or month or year
will only get better than it is today.
So I just keep waiting to see hoe great it will get!
- Stevie Ray Vaughan

When you've seen beyond yourself, then you may find,
peace of mind is waiting there.
- George Harrison

Making a movie is a long, dull process.
There's a lot of waiting around.
- Julia Louis-Dreyfus

I'm one of the great unemployed looking for the next job.
I'm waiting for the right offer.
Like anyone, I want something that turns me on inside.
- Francesca Annis

I like to be in waiting rooms with people as they're auditioning,
because their terror calms me.
- John C. McGinley

All my life I've been waiting for this,
and now it can happen.
A Williams is going to win.
- Richard Williams

It's hard to find a play that's right for me to do.
Rather than waiting around for the right script to come along,
I decided to write one myself.
- Dan Castellaneta

If the federal government had been around when the
Creator was putting His hand to this state,
Indiana wouldn't be here.
It'd still be waiting for an environmental impact statement.
- Ronald Reagan

Congress should be forward thinking in the policies we set,
instead of waiting until catastrophe looms.
- Bill Frist

What should I have known or written had I been a quiet,
mercantile politician or a lord in waiting? A man must travel,
and turmoil, or there is no existence.
- George Byron

If you're an actor, even a successful one,
you're still waiting for the phone to ring.
- Kevin Bacon

The worst part was waiting around.
Sometimes you are ready at 9 a.m.
and you don't start until the afternoon.
Occupying your time while you wait is the hardest part of the movie.
- Colleen Haskell

Well, you'll find the most boring part of it is the waiting,
at least if it's in films anyway.
Television's a lot faster, but the product...
I don't think it's as good as a film.
- Lee Hazlewood

There's a line of dancers waiting to get into Sydney Dance Company.
- Graeme Murphy


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- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

 


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