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I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I
by Lily Tomlin

I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I
should have been more specific.
- Lily Tomlin

Related topics: Funny

If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in the library?
- Lily Tomlin

If I had known what it would be like to have it all -
I might have been willing to settle for less.
- Lily Tomlin

I personally think we developed language
because of our deep need to complain.
- Lily Tomlin

 

The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win,
you're still a rat.
- Lily Tomlin

Sometimes I worry about being a success in a mediocre world.
- Lily Tomlin

If love is the answer,
could you please rephrase the question.
- Lily Tomlin

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Ninety eight percent of the adults in this country are decent,
hardworking, honest Americans.
It's the other lousy two percent that get all the publicity.
But then, we elected them.
- Lily Tomlin

We're all in this alone.
- Lily Tomlin

We are all in this together, by ourselves.
- Lily Tomlin

For fast-acting relief try slowing down.
- Lily Tomlin

What is reality, anyway? Just a collective hunch.
- Lily Tomlin

If you read a lot of books you are considered well read.
But if you watch a lot of TV, you're not considered well viewed.
- Lily Tomlin

I've always wanted to be somebody, but I see now I
should have been more specific.
- Lily Tomlin

I always wondered why somebody doesn't do something about that.
Then I realized I was somebody.
- Lily Tomlin

Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain.
- Lily Tomlin

Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle drugs.
- Lily Tomlin

It's my belief we developed language because of our
deep inner need to complain.
- Lily Tomlin

The best mind-altering drug is the truth.
- Lily Tomlin

What if it's boring - or if it's not boring,
it might be too revealing, or worse,
it might be too revealing and still be boring.
- Lily Tomlin

There's so much plastic in this culture that vinyl
leopard skin is becoming an endangered synthetic.
- Lily Tomlin

We don't care.
We don't have to.
We're the phone company.
- Lily Tomlin

Instead of working for the survival of the fittest,
we should be working for the survival of the wittiest -
then we can all die laughing.
- Lily Tomlin

Sometimes I feel like a figment of my own imagination.
- Lily Tomlin

Don't be afraid of missing opportunities.
Behind every failure is an opportunity somebody wishes they had missed.
- Lily Tomlin

Reality is nothing but a collective hunch.
- Lily Tomlin

Why isn't there a special name for the tops of your feet?
- Lily Tomlin

Reality is the leading cause of stress among those in touch with it.
- Lily Tomlin

Remember we're all in this alone.
- Lily Tomlin

I worry that the person who thought up Muzak may be
thinking up something else.
- Lily Tomlin

No matter how cynical you become, it's never enough to keep up.
- Lily Tomlin

I like a teacher who gives you something to take home
to think about besides homework.
- Lily Tomlin

Things are going to get a lot worse before they get worse.
- Lily Tomlin

Why is it that when we talk to God we're said to be praying,
but when God talks to us we're schizophrenic?
- Lily Tomlin

The problem with winning the rat race is you're still a rat.
- Lily Tomlin

Even the rich are hungry for love,
for being cared for, for being wanted,
for having someone to call their own.
- Mother Teresa

A somebody was once a nobody who wanted to and did.
- John Burroughs

Sometimes you get the results you wanted,
sometimes you don't.
What matters is that you did your best.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

In all our contacts, it is probably the sense
of being really needed and wanted
which gives us the greatest satisfaction
and creates the most lasting bond.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

Piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind. "Pooh?" he whispered.
"Yes, Piglet?"
"Nothing," said Piglet, taking Pooh's hand.
"I just wanted to be sure of you."
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

Today is the right day to do
what you have long wanted to do.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I wish my mother had left me something about how she felt growing up.
I wish my grandmother had done the same.
I wanted my girls to know me.
- Carol Burnett

Love cannot endure indifference.
It needs to be wanted.
Like a lamp, it needs to be fed out of the oil of another's heart,
or its flame burns low.
- Henry Ward Beecher

I wanted to be with the kind of people I'd grown up with,
but you can't go back to them and be one of them again,
no matter how hard you try.
- Ethel Waters

Both my mother and father were very supportive of any
career move any of us wanted to make.
- James Gandolfini

I wanted to buy a candle holder, but the store didn't have one.
So I got a cake.
- Mitch Hedberg

Designers are very fickle.
I never wanted to be a victim of that.
You're in one minute, out the next.
- Tyra Banks

I wanted to take up music, so my father bought me a blunt instrument.
He told me to knock myself out.
- Jay London

I always imagined I could be what I wanted to be.
- Chris Brown

I wanted to escape so badly.
But of course I knew I couldn't just give up and leave school.
It was only when I heard my mom's voice that I came out of my hiding place.
- Zhang Ziyi

My boyfriend and I broke up.
He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to.
- Rita Rudner

I realized my family was funny, because nobody ever
wanted to leave our house.
- Anthony Anderson

I wanted to marry a girl just like my mom.
- Michael Bergin

If God wanted us to fly, He would have given us tickets.
- Mel Brooks

Growing up, I wanted desperately to please,
to be a good girl.
- Claire Danes

I would never have done what I'd done if I'd considered
my father as somebody I wanted to please.
- Robert Mapplethorpe

Earth Day 1970 was irrefutable evidence that the American
people understood the environmental threat and wanted action to resolve it.
- Barry Commoner

If God wanted us to bend over he'd put diamonds on the floor.
- Joan Rivers

I wanted to be a forest ranger or a coal man.
At a very early age, I knew I didn't want to do what my dad did,
which was work in an office.
- Harrison Ford

Secretly, I wanted to look like Jimi Hendrix,
but I could never quite pull it off.
- Bryan Ferry

This is a wonderful way to celebrate an 80th birthday...
I wanted to be 65 again, but they wouldn't let me -
Homeland Security.
- Art Buchwald

After fifteen minutes I wanted to marry her,
and after half an hour
I completely gave up the idea of stealing her purse.
- the movie Take the Money and Run (1969)

Making duplicate copies and computer printouts of things
no one wanted even one of in the first place is giving
America a new sense of purpose.
- Andy Rooney

I drank some boiling water because I wanted to whistle.
- Mitch Hedberg

Wanted: a needle swift enough to sew this poem into a blanket.
- Charles Simic

I wanted to know the name of every stone
and flower and insect and bird and beast.
I wanted to know where it got its color, where it got its life -
but there was no one to tell me.
- George Washington Carver

I wanted to see exotic Vietnam, the jewel of Southeast Asia.
I, uh, I wanted to meet interesting
and stimulating people of an ancient culture,
and kill them.
- the movie Full Metal Jacket

There's sometimes a weird benefit to having an alcoholic,
violent father.
He really motivated me in that I never wanted to be anything like him.
- Dean Koontz

My love of fine art increased - the more of it I saw,
the more of it I wanted to see.
- Paul Getty

I have often wanted to drown my troubles,
but I can't get my wife to go swimming.
- Anonymous

In my prayers I never said I needed a home.
I said I wanted a sanctuary.
- Mary Anne Radmacher


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

 


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