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I do most of my work sitting down; that's where I shine. ...
by Robert Benchley

I do most of my work sitting down; that's where I shine.
- Robert Benchley

Anyone can do any amount of work
provided it isn't the work
he is supposed to be doing at the moment.
- Robert Benchley

I have tried to know absolutely nothing about a great many things,
and I have succeeded fairly well.
- Robert Benchley

Dachshunds are ideal dogs for small children,
as they are already stretched and pulled to such a
length that the child cannot do much harm one way or the other.
- Robert Benchley

 

There seems to be no lengths to which humorless people
will not go to analyze humor.
It seems to worry them.
- Robert Benchley

In America there are two classes of travel -
first class,
and with children.
- Robert Benchley

Drawing on my fine command of the English language,
I said nothing.
- Robert Benchley

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A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance,
and to turn around three times before lying down.
- Robert Benchley

Drinking makes such fools of people,
and people are such fools to begin with that it's compounding a felony.
- Robert Benchley

We are constantly being surprised that people did things
well before we were born.
- Robert Benchley

Anyone who tries to keep track of what is happening
in China is going to end up by wearing all the skin
of his left ear from twirling around on it.
- Robert Benchley

Behind every argument is someone's ignorance.
- Robert Benchley

It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing,
but I couldn't give it up because by that time I was too famous.
- Robert Benchley

An ardent supporter of the hometown team should go
to a game prepared to take offense,
no matter what happens.
- Robert Benchley

Even nowadays a man can't step up and kill a woman
without feeling just a bit unchivalrous.
- Robert Benchley

Tell us your phobias and we will tell you what you are afraid of.
- Robert Benchley

At fifteen one is first beginning to realize that everything
isn't money and power in this world,
and is casting about for joys that do not turn to dross in one's hands.
- Robert Benchley

I know I'm drinking myself to a slow death,
but then I'm in no hurry.
- Robert Benchley

Most of the arguments to which I am party fall somewhat
short of being impressive,
owing to the fact that neither I nor my opponent knows
what we are talking about.
- Robert Benchley

Nothing makes a man feel older than to hear a band
coming up the street and not to have the impulse to
rush downstairs and out on to the sidewalk.
- Robert Benchley

A boy can learn a lot from a dog: obedience,
loyalty, and the importance of turning around three times before lying down.
- Robert Benchley

I have been told by hospital authorities that more
copies of my works are left behind by departing patients
than those of any other author.
- Robert Benchley

Why don't you get out of that wet coat and into a dry martini?
- Robert Benchley

The biggest obstacle to professional writing is the
necessity for changing a typewriter ribbon.
- Robert Benchley

If Mr. Einstein doesn't like the natural laws of the universe,
let him go back to where he came from.
- Robert Benchley

You might think that after thousands of years of coming
up too soon and getting frozen,
the crocus family would have had a little sense knocked into it.
- Robert Benchley

We call ourselves a free nation, and yet we let ourselves
be told what cabs we can and can't take by a man at a hotel door,
simply because he has a drum major's uniform on.
- Robert Benchley

In a house where there are small children the bathroom
soon takes on the appearance of the Old Curiosity Shop.
- Robert Benchley

The surest way to make a monkey of a man is to quote him.
- Robert Benchley

The freelance writer is a man who is paid per piece or per word or perhaps.
- Robert Benchley

A real hangover is nothing to try out family remedies on.
The only cure for a real hangover is death.
- Robert Benchley

After an author has been dead for some time,
it becomes increasingly difficult for his publishers
to get a new book out of him each year.
- Robert Benchley

A great many people have come up to me and asked how
I manage to get so much work done and still keep looking so dissipated.
- Robert Benchley

Great literature must spring from an upheaval in the author's soul.
If that upheaval is not present then it must come from
the works of any other author which happens to be handy and easily adapted.
- Robert Benchley

There is a note in the front of the volume saying that
no public reading may be given without first getting the author's permission.
It ought to be made much more difficult to do than that.
- Robert Benchley

Other men wear white suits in summer and it doesn't seem to bother them.
But my white suit seems to be a little whiter than theirs.
I think also that it may have something written on the back of it,
although I can't find it when I take the suit off.
- Robert Benchley

For a nation which has an almost evil reputation for bustle,
bustle, bustle, and rush, rush, rush,
we spend an enormous amount of time standing around
in line in front of windows,
just waiting.
- Robert Benchley

As we work to create light for others,
we naturally light our own way.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

Live boldly. Laugh Loudly. Love Truly.
Play as often as you can
Work as smart as you are able.
Share your heart as deeply as you can reach.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

A time for work, a time for play -
balance in all things.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

If you want to make peace with your enemy,
you have to work with your enemy.
Then he becomes your partner.
- Nelson Mandela

Dare to dream of your great success.
Become intimate with those things
which deeply motivate you
and regularly work toward
the realization of that mission.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

What are you committed to?
Have you started, or are you still thinking about it -
and making excuses?
Do you work toward your goal each day?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

When you are in any contest,
you should work as if there were -
to the very last minute - a chance to lose it.
This is battle, this is politics, this is anything.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

Life grants nothing to us mortals without hard work.
- Horace

The harder I work, the luckier I get.
- Samuel Goldwyn

Better learn balance. Balance is key.
Balance good, karate good. Everything good.
Balance bad, better pack up, go home. Understand?
- Miyagi: character in the movie Karate Kid

Profit is a by-product of work;
happiness is its chief product.
- Henry Ford

You only live once -
but if you work it right, once is enough.
- Joe E. Lewis

You are never given a wish without also
being given the power to make it true.
You may have to work for it, however.
- Richard Bach

If you have built castles in the air,
your work need not be lost;
that is where they should be.
Now put foundations under them.
- Henry David Thoreau

Confidence is the most important single factor in this game,
and no matter how great your natural talent,
there is only one way to obtain and sustain it: work.
- Jack Nicklaus

Many hands make light work.
- Proverb

Work like you don't need the money.
Love like you've never been hurt.
Dance like nobody's watching.
- Satchel Paige

Whatever your life's work is, do it well.
A man should do his job so well that the living,
the dead, and the unborn could do it no better.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

If in our daily life we can smile,
if we can be peaceful and happy,
not only we, but everyone will profit from it.
This is the most basic kind of peace work.
- Thich Nhat Hanh

If it is surely the means to the highest end we know,
can any work be humble or disgusting?
Will it not rather be elevating as a ladder,
the means by which we are translated?
- Henry David Thoreau

Opportunity is missed by most people
because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.
- Thomas Edison

Be true to your work, your word, and your friend.
- Henry David Thoreau

The harder you work, the harder it is to surrender.
- Vince Lombardi

I find that the harder I work,
the more luck I seem to have.
- Thomas Jefferson

My experience has been that work is
almost the best way to pull oneself out of the depths.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

Problems are only opportunities in work clothes.
- Henry Kaiser

There are no secrets to success.
It is the result of preparation,
hard work, and learning from failure.
- Colin Powell

People who work together will win,
whether it be against complex football defenses,
or the problems of modern society.
- Vince Lombardi

It isn't enough to talk about peace.
One must believe in it.
And it isn't enough to believe in it.
One must work at it.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

I am a great believer in luck
and I find that the harder
I work the more I have of it.
- Thomas Jefferson

The trick is in what one emphasizes.
We either make ourselves miserable,
or we make ourselves happy.
The amount of work is the same.
- Carlos Castaneda

When the best leader's work is done the people say,
"We did it ourselves."
- Lao Tzu

Laziness may appear attractive,
but work gives satisfaction.
- Anne Frank

Three Rules of Work:
Out of clutter find simplicity;
From discord find harmony;
In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity.
- Albert Einstein


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- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

 


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