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Bob Saget Quotes and Sayings

I hope you find great value in these Quotes by Bob Saget from my large collection of motivational and inspirational quotes and sayings.

I have three kids, the oldest is 18 and her friends
are going to see it The Aristocrats because they told
her they're going to see it,
especially her guy friends.
- Bob Saget

I think when you dissect a joke too much,
you have ruined whatever there is in comedy.
- Bob Saget

Now people want what the movie was about,
which is violent comedy.
And that's really what The Aristocrats is based on -
what will a family do out of desperation.
- Bob Saget

It's 103 comedians, or however many it is,
and how would everyone tell it.
It's enough people of substance that it makes you think
of the people who aren't there that are alive.
- Bob Saget

 

I just did a play in New York which has been my best
experience that I've had for maybe ever.
It was Paul Weitz's play called Privilege and I was
in New York for three months.
- Bob Saget

Yet there are some people - Steve Allen would dissect comedy forever;
he's a really funny guy,
but he would love talking about comedy.
I'm doing it right now and you all seem bored.
- Bob Saget

The nature of comedy is 'just do it.'
But I think what's interesting about it is this joke has been around and why.
And it's just saying what's wrong and how wrong can you be if you say it.
- Bob Saget

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I have a feeling I'm going to wake up one day and say
'I can't do dirty stuff anymore,
I want to go all clean.' I'll do clean stuff too,
I like to entertain people.
Then they egged me on; we shot it at The Laugh Factory.
- Bob Saget

Paul Riser tells it in an interesting way;
he dissects it and tells the structure,
you know, 'you don't mention that part here.'
But that's what's interesting about it and the people
who are absent are interesting too.
- Bob Saget

What I have now are good problems of trying to decide
and what I really want to do is good work next.
My phone's ringing a lot more and I've got nine lines so when it doesn't ring,
it's very frustrating.
- Bob Saget

I think Desperate Housewives is a pretty good show,
I watch it, I like it and I don't love reality tv that much.
I do watch some, I've got three daughters so we'll watch the good stuff,
the fun stuff.
- Bob Saget

I'm doing 5000 seat theaters and audiences are going nuts,
it's fantastic and it makes me very happy.
I'm dirty, but not like this; I just do comedy that I find funny.
I'm working on a new tv show for cable and it's not set up yet.
- Bob Saget

I don't roll like that but I've never been with a hooker either.
Yeah, that's good to say in an interview cause I feel
bad a little because people grew up watching me and
that's a little disturbing.
- Bob Saget

I don't like the negative of reality tv -
the 'you're no good,
so you have to leave, I choose you, but I thought you really loved me.'
It's all about how bad people are and I just hate that.
I like Pimp my Ride where someone is helping somebody.
- Bob Saget

I've had a pilot every single year that didn't sell for the past four years,
that'll smack you in the back of the head.
I had a really good one last year; I wouldn't have
done the play in New York if I had gotten that one.
- Bob Saget

It was a JOB; the video show was a JOB;
you don't tell the Aristocrats joke at 8 o'clock at night on network tv,
it would be funny though.
But those guys know I like dirty stuff,
I like clean stuff too.
- Bob Saget

There was this whole middle time that only Chris Rock came out of,
you know, 10 years ago it was Chris and a few other people,
but that's about it.
Chris is in a class of his own; I don't see another
comedian who I put in high regard as him.
- Bob Saget

25, 30 years ago, that meant something,
they were making some money.
And they were doing all sorts of comedy,
screaming at the audience, basically crowd control.
And then there was the whole urban comedy scene.
- Bob Saget

See no evil, Hear no evil, Speak no evil.
- Japanese pictorial maxim (the Three Wise Monkeys) PHOTO

Three grand essentials to happiness in this life are
something to do,
something to love,
and something to hope for.
- Joseph Addison

I have just three things to teach:
simplicity, patience, compassion.
These three are your greatest treasures.
- Lao Tzu

There are only two or three human stories,
and they go on repeating themselves as fiercely
as if they had never happened before.
- Willa Cather PHOTO

Never forget the three powerful resources
you always have available to you:
love, prayer, and forgiveness.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

I had three chairs in my house;
one for solitude, two for friendship, three for society.
- Henry David Thoreau

All truth passes through three stages:
First, it is ridiculed;
Second, it is violently opposed;
Third, it is accepted as self-evident.
- Arthur Schopenhauer

Three things cannot be long hidden:
the sun, the moon, and the truth.
- The Buddha

Three Rules of Work:
Out of clutter find simplicity;
From discord find harmony;
In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity.
- Albert Einstein

There are three classes of people:
those who see,
those who see when they are shown,
those who do not see.
- Leonardo da Vinci

All Knowledge is Divided into Three Domains:
"What We Know",
"What We Know That We Don't Know", and
"What We Don't Know That We Don't Know."
- Werner Erhard

A friendship will be young after the lapse of half a century;
a passion is old at the end of three months.
- Madame Swetchine

To the uneducated an A is just three sticks.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

I have three precious things which I hold fast and prize.
The first is gentleness;
the second is frugality;
the third is humility, which keeps me from putting myself before others.
Be gentle and you can be bold;
be frugal and you can be generous;
avoid putting yourself before others
and you can become a leader among men.
- Lao Tzu

Steve Jobs' Three Rules of Life ...
1. Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life.
2. Don't be trapped by dogma -
which is living with the results of other people's thinking.
Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your own inner voice.
3. Have the courage to follow your heart and intuition -
they somehow already know what you truly want to become.
- Steve Jobs

Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
- Benjamin Franklin

There are three hundred and sixty-four days
when you might get un-birthday presents,
and only one for birthday presents, you know.
- Lewis Carroll

Now abide faith, hope, love, these three;
but the greatest of these is love.
- Corinthians 13:13

I have three kinds of friends:
those who love me,
those who pay no attention to me,
and those who detest me.
- Nicolas De Chamfort

There are three types of lies -
lies, damn lies, and statistics.
- Benjamin Disraeli

I want to share with you the three rules
that I have in order to accept an apprentice.
Rule Number 1: Don't believe me.
I don't want you to believe me
but I want you to listen and make choices - your choices.
If what I say, doesn't work for you, leave it.
But if it works for you and that's what you want, then make it yours.
Rule Number 2: Don't believe yourself.
Why? Because most of your belief system is a lie - it's not true.
And by believing yourself, you create all the limitations
that don't allow you to be what you really are.
Don't believe yourself. Listen to what you say,
listen to what you think, listen to what you believe.
And when you listen, open your ears, open your mind,
open your intelligence and make choices.
Rule 3 is, don't believe anybody else.
Don't believe them at all.
Open your ears and your mind; listen and make choices.
- don Miguel Ruiz

In three words, I can sum up everything
I've learned about life - it goes on.
- Robert Frost

I truly believe that happiness is possible...
even when you're thirty-three
and have a bottom the size of two bowling balls.
- the movie Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason

There are three rules for dating:
1) Don't;
2) If you must, just be careful;
3) Forget the rules, your hormones will win anyway.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

We have three cats.
It's like having children, but there is no tuition involved.
- Ron Reagan

There's three things men always talk about -
women,
sports, and cars.
- Mario Lopez

My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four.
Unless there are three other people.
- Orson Welles

Baseball is almost the only orderly thing in a very unorderly world.
If you get three strikes, even the best lawyer in the world can't get you off.
- Bill Veeck

By three methods we may learn wisdom:
First,
by reflection, which is noblest; Second,
by imitation, which is easiest; and third by experience,
which is the bitterest.
- Confucius

One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends
is that three out of four murders
are committed by people who know the victim.
- George Carlin

I did not have three thousand pairs of shoes,
I had one thousand and sixty.
- Imelda Marcos

Voting is an expression of three key life principles -
CHOICE, INTENT, and ACTION.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I do love Italian food.
Any kind of pasta or pizza.
My new pig out food is Indian food.
I eat Indian food like three times a week.
It's so good.
- Jennifer Love Hewitt

You know they say the most dangerous person of the
world is a member of the United States Congress just
home from a three-day fact-finding trip.
- Johnny Isakson

There are only three things women need in life:
food,
water, and compliments.
- Chris Rock

When I was 18, I thought my father was pretty dumb.
After a while when I got to be 21, I was amazed to
find out how much he'd learned in three years.
- Frank Butler

If you can change three lives in 10,
three lives in a hundred,
that's got to be good, hasn't it?
- Ian Botham

Inanimate objects can be classified scientifically
into three major categories;
those that don't work,
those that break down and those that get lost.
- Russell Baker

My wife and I tried two or three times in the last 40 years
to have breakfast together,
but it was so disagreeable we had to stop.
- Winston Churchill

Baseball is the only field of endeavor where a man
can succeed three times out of ten and be considered a good performer.
- Ted Williams

Three things are needed for a good life,
good friends, good food, and good song.
- Jason Zebehazy

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance,
and to turn around three times before lying down.
- Robert Benchley

Think what a better world it would be if we all,
the whole world, had cookies and milk about three o'clock
every afternoon and then lay down on our blankets for a nap.
- Barbara Jordan

I love short trips to New York; to me it is the finest three-day town on earth.
- James Cameron

Each memorable verse of a true poet has two or three
times the written content.
- Alfred de Musset

The time to enjoy a European trip is about three weeks after unpacking.
- George Ade

Always remember the three magic words: You're right dear.
- Anonymous

Good teaching is one-fourth preparation and three-fourths pure theatre.
- Gail Godwin

Jim Bakker spells his name with two k's because three would be too obvious.
- Bill Maher

I refuse to spend my life worrying about what I eat.
There is no pleasure worth forgoing just for an extra
three years in the geriatric ward.
- John Mortimer

He is a drunkard who takes more than
three glasses though he be not drunk.
- Epictetus

Guests, like fish, begin to smell after three days.
- Benjamin Franklin

To fear love is to fear life, and those who fear life
are already three parts dead.
- Bertrand Russell


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