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Jay Mohr Quotes and Sayings

I hope you find great value in these Quotes by Jay Mohr from my large collection of motivational and inspirational quotes and sayings.

I wasn't the guy everyone liked.
I was the guy that wouldn't shut up.
- Jay Mohr

I think golf is a waste of time and a waste of a sunny afternoon.
I also stink at it.
I have never found anything, including divorce and
a sexual harassment suit,
more frustrating.
- Jay Mohr

True Yankees are born, not made.
- Jay Mohr

I never minded George Steinbrenner spending obscene
amounts of money to put the best product on the field.
- Jay Mohr

 

Why are baseball managers the only coaches who dress up like the players?
- Jay Mohr

I hate golf.
I do not understand how anyone can enjoy it,
much less love it.
- Jay Mohr

I think I made a mistake once...
yeah...
it was only once.
- Jay Mohr

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Fantasy football is not only a good thing,
but a great thing.
- Jay Mohr

When human beings stop progressing at an endeavor,
they stop enjoying it and move on to something else.
Not golfers.
Masochists, all of them.
- Jay Mohr

If it doesn't know what to charge you for nosebleed seats,
your team sucks.
- Jay Mohr

If it has to sell its mascot, your team sucks.
- Jay Mohr

Not everyone likes sports.
Gandhi and Malcolm X come to mind.
- Jay Mohr

You know how to tell if the teacher is hung over? Movie Day.
- Jay Mohr

Unfortunately, there are no mulligans when it comes
to pro football contracts.
- Jay Mohr

I wonder why there is a designated hitter in baseball
after all these years? As an experiment,
it seemed like a swell enough idea, but you would think
the novelty would have worn off by now and everyone
would get back to playing baseball.
- Jay Mohr

There's a lot of music that sounds like it's literally computer-generated,
totally divorced from a guy sitting down at an instrument.
- Aimee Mann

My father was the guy on the block who said hi to everyone.
- Damon Wayans

Marriages don't last. When I meet a guy,
the first question I ask myself is:
is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?
- Rita Rudner

My father, he was like the rock, the guy you went to with every problem.
- Gwyneth Paltrow

A James Cagney love scene is one where he lets the other guy live.
- Bob Hope

Whenever I date a guy, I think,
"Is this the man I want my children
to spend their weekends with?"
- Rita Rudner

The buck stops with the guy who signs the checks.
- Rupert Murdoch

An optimist is a guy that has never had much experience.
- Don Marquis

Dirty Harry, for example.
Clint Eastwood was not a rogue cop.
He was a maverick cop, but he was a good guy.
- Charlton Heston

So I was always around music and my dad was in his
own way a progressive jazzer,
a big band jazzer guy.
- Billy Sherwood

Somebody's gotta win and somebody's gotta lose and
I believe in letting the other guy lose.
- Pete Rose

Sometimes I'd like to play the bad guy and sometimes
I'd like to die in a movie.
- Jackie Chan

I personally hold Blair more responsible for this war than I do George Bush.
The reason is, Blair knows better, Blair is not an idiot.
What is he doing hanging around this guy?
- Michael Moore

As a teenager I was so insecure.
I was the type of guy that never fitted in because
he never dared to choose.
I was convinced I had absolutely no talent at all.
For nothing.
And that thought took away all my ambition too.
- Johnny Depp

And I got to know Red Foley well.
And I got to know Lefty really well,
he was a great guy.
- Mel Tillis

I didn't want to be seen as just a guy on a list.
I'm interested in good scripts, scripts that are about something,
scripts that move your acting along.
- Stephen Rea

I'm a 50 year-old guy and I'm not in shape like I was when I was 30.
- Richard Gere

My dad was a musician, it was just what he did,
like another guy's dad drives a meat truck.
Our house was normal.
We weren't taken with the fact our dad was a musician.
- Branford Marsalis

I think every group of black guys should have at least one white guy in it.
- Dave Chappelle

I've always been pretty old-fashioned.
I'm kind of a missionary guy.
- Charlie Sheen

I'm sort of like a lame, single guy in a red sports car.
- Billy Corgan

I'm a lucky guy and I'm happy to be with the Yankees.
And I want to thank everyone for making this night necessary.
- Yogi Berra

I'm getting better now, but I used to be incredibly awkward with girls.
I think any guy who says 'I've never had an awkward
moment with a girl' is a liar.
- Daniel Radcliffe

President Obama insists he's a free-market guy.
But you have to wonder whether he understands how a
free economy really works.
- Fred Barnes

I'm not a bling-bling guy; I can't pull it off.
I just look like an idiot.
- Michael Vartan

I used to not stutter any.
Oh, I did when I was a kid, I stuttered,
I had a bad stutter until I was probably between the
second and third grade and a guy got rid of it for me.
- Lee Hazlewood

The guy was infected with bird flu because he took a sick chicken,
slaughtered it and and then ate it.
- Thaksin Shinawatra

A woman would pitch a joke.
Nothing.
Then a guy would pitch it and everybody would laugh.
- Wanda Sykes

I'd love to play a villain in a movie,
the kind of bad guy you would never think of me being able to play.
Like most people, I have a darker side I'd like to explore onscreen.
- Garth Brooks

My object is to stop the guy with the ball before he gains another inch.
- Dick Lane

My friend told me I went over to this guy and he pulled a knife.
- Matt Nagle

Jesse McCartney is one of the nicest people around.
I hate when I hear bad things about him,
because anyone who knows him would agree that he's
a good guy and really humble.
- Zac Efron

How can a guy climb trees, say Me Tarzan,
You Jane, and make a million?
- Johnny Weissmuller

I'm John Lee Hooker in the sense that he was a blues
man and he played blues his whole life.
I'm a rock guy and I'm going to play rock music my whole life.
- Sammy Hagar

Cal Ripken is steady, he focuses on his job,
and he's a good guy.
- Bradley Whitford

If people think I am gay, yeah, hey that doesn't bother me.
Not at all.
What would people think? To me I am such a heterosexual guy.
It doesn't even, I don't even think about it.
- Jason Priestley

Any guy that's not working with the same amount of
intensity and passion that I do,
I don't want to know.
- Zakk Wylde

Villains never know they are villains in a picture
so I play this like I'm the nicest guy in the world.
- Wayne Rogers

How to drive a guy crazy: send him a telegram and on the top put 'page 2.'
- Henny Youngman

I'd better be on the road, or I'll be going nuts.
I'm not the kind of guy who sits around with a pipe
and slippers watching soap operas.
- Tommy Shaw

I'm not the kind of guy who deserves to play a vintage
guitar because I'm too rough on instruments.
- Tommy Shaw

Whether it s the country or city, I never liked the bad guy.
- Robert Stack

The Democrats and Republicans are the same guy admiring themself in the mirror.
- Kinky Friedman

Even if I was a bad right wing guy, to the extent of
whether my arguments are right or wrong,
they're right or wrong independently if I'm right or left.
- Bjorn Lomborg

We could see that he was a charismatic guy who jumps
over the moon and is very competitive,
but nobody could have predicted what he would become to our culture.
- Phil Knight

Basically it's the core story.
About a guy having an affair with the mother of the
girl he falls in love with.
- Buck Henry

If one is desperate for love, I suggest looking at
one's friends and family and see if love is all around.
If not, get a new set of friends, a new family.
- Jasmine Guy

The other guy I dug a lot was Burroughs because he was a smart man already;
he learned it through the druggie pool -
the street scene of an old aristocratic kind of man.
- Gregory Corso

George of the Jungle is a cartoon.
He's a guy who swings around on a vine all day.
Are you not buying that?
- Brendan Fraser

I'm a product of good nutrition, cutting edge supplementation and hard training,
and I'm an old guy.
- Warren Cuccurullo

I think Chris Matthews is a very bright guy.
I'd listen to him even if he didn't shout at people.
- Peter Jennings

I happen to be a guy who also plays the piano and sings,
so people automatically associate me with Billy Joel.
- Gavin DeGraw

I was on a soap opera before that for three years,
where I was the nicest guy on earth.
- Ray Liotta

The guy has to kill the spider and get the dead mouse outta the pool.
- Leah Remini

It ain't about if he knocks a guy out.
It's about how he knocks a guy out.
It's the style, the improvisation.
- Don King

A broken heart is what makes life so wonderful five years later,
when you see the guy in an elevator and he is fat and
smoking a cigar and saying long-time-no-see.
- Phyllis Battelle


Quotes and Sayings

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