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Lenny Bruce Quotes and Sayings

I hope you find great value in these Quotes by Lenny Bruce from my large collection of motivational and inspirational quotes and sayings.

Miami Beach is where neon goes to die.
- Lenny Bruce

Related topics: Funny

If Jesus had been killed twenty years ago,
Catholic school children would be wearing little electric
chairs around their necks instead of crosses.
- Lenny Bruce

If you can take the hot lead enema, then you can cast the first stone.
- Lenny Bruce

In the Halls of Justice the only justice is in the halls.
- Lenny Bruce

 

Communism is like one big phone company.
- Lenny Bruce

A lot of people say to me, 'Why did you kill Christ?' I dunno,
it was one of those parties, got out of hand,
you know.
- Lenny Bruce

The only truly anonymous donor is the guy who knocks up your daughter.
- Lenny Bruce

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The role of a comedian is to make the audience laugh,
at a minimum of once every fifteen seconds.
- Lenny Bruce

Every day people are straying away from the church and going back to God.
- Lenny Bruce

The "what should be" never did exist,
but people keep trying to live up to it.
There is no "what should be," there is only what is.
- Lenny Bruce

When you're eight years old nothing is your business.
- Lenny Bruce

I'll die young, but it's like kissing God.
- Lenny Bruce

There are never enough I Love You's.
- Lenny Bruce

The liberals can understand everything but people who don't understand them.
- Lenny Bruce

I won't say ours was a tough school,
but we had our own coroner.
We used to write essays like: What I'm going to be if I grow up.
- Lenny Bruce

I hate small towns because once you've seen the cannon
in the park there's nothing else to do.
- Lenny Bruce

The only honest art form is laughter,
comedy.
You can't fake it...
try to fake three laughs in an hour -
ha ha ha ha ha -
they'll take you away,
man.
You can't.
- Lenny Bruce

Satire is tragedy plus time.
You give it enough time, the public,
the reviewers will allow you to satirize it.
Which is rather ridiculous, when you think about it.
- Lenny Bruce

I love David Caruso.
I know it's not cool, but I do.
I watch CSI: Miami.
I think he's interesting.
- James Denton

I put a lot into it, and when I am done playing,
I plan on going undercover and then being the sheriff
or chief of police somewhere,
either Miami or Orlando, I don't know yet.
- Shaquille O'Neal

Miami is one of these great places that is a really sensual,
physically beautiful place.
- Michael Mann

More than 10,000 ballots in Miami-Dade County have
been rejected by some machine without any opportunity
for a human being to take a look.
That is just not right.
- Patricia Ireland

The Miami Dolphins have to be taken seriously.
Here's a team that seems to be jelling.
- Al Michaels

Why can't DFW compete like San Francisco does with Oakland,
like Miami does with Fort Lauderdale,
and like Chicago O'Hare does with Midway?
- John Ensign

I'd heard it was dangerous to walk around Miami.
- Victoria Abril

I learned a lot in those first years in Miami,
while struggling just for survival, by observing my father's fortitude.
- Desi Arnaz

As the plane got closer to Miami, I had this terrible feeling he was dying.
Maybe he was telling me that he was going.
I felt anger, panic, despair and helplessness.
- Robin Gibb

It happened in Miami, in Coral Gables,
a great big ol' Cuban wedding.
It was pretty intense.
- Jon Secada

One girl who stands out was this Miami stripper.
She still lives with her mother and father,
and they know she strips.
They call her by her stripper name, Freaky Red.
- Method Man

One of my favorite vacation places is Miami,
because of the people, the water and the beach -
of course -
and the architecture on Miami Beach is so wonderful.
- Oksana Baiul

If there was any other place I would live,
other than Miami, it would be California.
It's beautiful.
The weather is just gorgeous, I love being here,
too.
- Jon Secada

I had learned something of Miami from people who had visited there,
so I knew what to expect.
- Sidney Poitier

Jews don't care about ancient rivalries.
We worry about humidity in Miami.
- Evan Sayet

I had a call to the University of Miami where I'd run a revival in 1950.
- Howard Finster

So that when I came from Panama...
my family was exiled in 1973 and they went to Miami.
- Ruben Blades

And I've been acting for 39 years, so I define characters
differently than I did in say Miami Vice.
- Edward James Olmos

So that when I came to New York again,
it was, I'm not too sure right now, but it was '74 or '75.
I went to Miami in '74 and then I came to New York,
I think, at the end of '74.
- Ruben Blades

I struggled for 15 years in this business before Miami Vice came along.
- Don Johnson

We made part of the record in Miami,
and I would go down to the beach,
and not 20 feet from the water I see a fish that is
at least seven feet long swimming close to the shore.
I did not go back in the ocean the entire month.
- Michael Stipe

There are many really good teams in our conference this season.
Miami, Indiana and Detroit will be our fiercest opponents this year.
But we just have to focus on our game and be patient
with the realistic hope that we'll be on top after all is said and done.
- Jason Kidd

In 1938, when I had decided that the only way to see
the country was in a trailer,
and I built the trailer which I still have and lived
in it for eighteen months,
and learned America from San Diego to the Canadian border,
from Miami to New Jersey, and east to west in between.
- Leslie Charteris

Since it was too difficult to get into the Screen Actor's Guild in New York,
I moved to Miami in 1982 and started a successful career
as a television commercial actress,
obtaining my SAG card there.
- Donna Rice

So I went to Miami in '74 with my family and while
I was there it became obvious that we needed money
and we needed to do something,
because my family, we left without anything really,
and we didn't have any money to begin with.
- Ruben Blades

I think when you saw this year's playoffs,
Miami and Detroit have a pretty fierce rivalry now.
Also, the Suns and San Antonio look like they're starting
to develop something there.
I look forward to seeing those rivalries continue and develop.
- John Starks

I played from the time I was seven years old.
My father was my first baseman coach.
I had opportunities that I never really pursued -
with some Miami teams and a few larger colleges,
and then I ended up bailing and began cooking.
- Todd English

I have a very personal interest.
I am a Miami-Dade voter.
One of the issues is that my vote and so many other
votes of women and African Americans in Florida are
being discounted or discarded.
I want my vote to count.
- Patricia Ireland

My grandfather was a very elegant individual.
My father also.
He was a lawyer and farmer in Cuba.
In Miami, he had to go to work wherever he could.
But whenever it was time to go out, you saw how they
cared for how they looked.
- Andy Garcia

I have always said that I want to finish my career
with the Dolphins and this put me closer to that goal.
I have been fortunate to break many personal records,
but my overiding goal is to win a Super Bowl here in Miami.
- Dan Marino

But this is Miami, you can't come to Miami and not show any skin.
You gotta show something.
If you're all covered up in this heat,
you're gonna make me pass out out just to look at you.
It's sweaty in Miami-but the diamonds will keep me cool.
- Lil' Kim

Actually freestyle really comes from 'Planet Rock'.
If you listen to all the freestyle records you'll hear
that they are based on 'Planet Rock'.
All the Miami Bass records are based upon Planet Rock.
- Afrika Bambaataa

Darkness cannot drive out darkness;
only light can do that.
Hate cannot drive out hate;
only love can do that.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

Where there is great love,
there are always miracles.
- Willa Cather

Love does not claim possession, but gives freedom.
- Rabindranath Tagore

Use the power of your word
in the direction of truth and love.
- don Miguel Ruiz

Love one another but make not a bond of love.
Let it rather be a moving sea
between the shores of your souls.
- Khalil Gibran

Hate is never conquered by hate,
Hate is only conquered by love.
- The Buddha

Life is a reflection of intent.
Love reflects love.
Hate reflects hate.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Lord, grant that I might not so much
seek to be loved as to love.
- St. Francis of Assisi

People will forget what you said,
people will forget what you did,
but people will never forget
how you made them feel.
- Maya Angelou

If you love something, set it free;
if it comes back it's yours,
if it doesn't, it never was.
- Richard Bach

Love me when I least deserve it,
because that's when I really need it.
- Swedish Proverb

Do all things with love.
- Og Mandino

To the people who love you,
you are beautiful already.
This is not because they're
blind to your shortcomings
but because they so clearly see your soul.
- Victoria Moran

Forgiveness is an act of self-love and respect.
- don Miguel Ruiz

Love is when the other person's happiness
is more important than your own.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

This is my wish for you:
Comfort on difficult days,
Smiles when sadness intrudes,
Rainbows to follow the clouds,
Laughter to kiss your lips,
Sunsets to warm your heart,
Hugs when spirits sag,
Beauty for your eyes to see,
Friendships to brighten your being,
Faith so that you can believe,
Confidence for when you doubt,
Courage to know yourself,
Patience to accept the truth,
Love to complete your life.
- Anonymous

Love Without Limits.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Love is granting another the space to be
the way they are and the way they are not.
- Werner Erhard

Love means not ever having to say you're sorry.
- Erich Segal

We are not held back by the love we didn't receive in the past,
but by the love we're not extending in the present.
- Marianne Williamson

I love you just the way you are.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

 


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