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Married Quotes

I hope you find great value in these Quotes about Married from my large collection of inspirational quotes and motivational sayings.

I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner

Related topics: Funny Cynical Marriage

Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits
and then complain that he's not the man she married?
- Barbra Streisand PHOTO

Many important things shouldn't be done half-way.
Think of getting married, having children,
starting a business, changing your career.
There are times to gather your courage
and make the leap, the whole leap.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

That married couples can live together day after day
is a miracle that the Vatican has overlooked.
- Bill Cosby

 

When I get married, it'll be no secret.
- Elvis Presley

Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find
a woman I don't like and give her a house.
- Lewis Grizzard

Caesar might have married Cleopatra,
but he had a wife at home.
There's always something.
- Will Cuppy

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Never get married in college; it's hard to get a start
if a prospective employer finds you've already made one mistake.
- Elbert Hubbard

When people get married because they think
it's a long-time love affair,
they'll be divorced very soon,
because all love affairs end in disappointment.
But marriage is a recognition of a spiritual identity.
- Joseph Campbell

A man is incomplete until he is married.
After that, he is finished.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor

Getting divorced just because you don't love a man
is almost as silly as getting married just because you do.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor

I've never been married, but I tell people I'm divorced
so they won't think something's wrong with me.
- Elayne Boosler

It's tough to stay married.
My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass.
- Rodney Dangerfield

Once I got married and had kids, I moved away from romantic roles,
because it seemed wrong to have my 3-year-old wondering
why Daddy was kissing someone else.
- Chevy Chase

I married the first man I ever kissed.
When I tell this to my children, they just about throw up.
- Barbara Bush

I've been married to one Marxist and one Fascist,
and neither one would take the garbage out.
- Lee Grant

I met an American woman and got married so I had to get a job.
- Walter Wager

Hey, Marge. Isn't it great being married
to someone who's recklessly impulsive?
- The Simpsons Movie (2007)

All men make mistakes, but married men find out about them sooner.
- Red Skelton

I've had an exciting time; I married for love and got
a little money along with it.
- Rose Kennedy

No man is regular in his attendance at the House of
Commons until he is married.
- Benjamin Disraeli

She's been married so many times she has rice marks on her face.
- Henny Youngman

Never get married in the morning - you never know who
you might meet that night.
- Paul Hornung

If you want to sacrifice the admiration of many men
for the criticism of one,
go ahead, get married.
- Katharine Hepburn

Never tell a secret to a bride or a groom;
wait until they have been married longer.
- Edgar Watson Howe

One should never know too precisely
whom one has married
- Friedrich Nietzsche

Married people from my generation are like an endangered species!
- Patrice Leconte

Staying married may have long-term benefits.
You can elicit much more sympathy from friends over
a bad marriage than you ever can from a good divorce.
- P. J. O'Rourke

I was married by a judge.
I should have asked for a jury.
- Groucho Marx

One was never married, and that's his hell;
another is,
and that's his plague.
- Robert Burton

No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous

The only good husbands stay bachelors:
They're too considerate to get married.
- Finley Peter Dunne

A married woman has the same right to control her own
body as does an unmarried woman.
- Sol Wachtler

I have great hopes that we shall love each other all our lives
as much as if we had never married at all.
- Lord Byron

I'm married to the theater but my mistress is the films.
- Oskar Werner

Bachelors know more about women than married men;
if they didn't they'd be married too.
- H. L. Mencken

It's a funny thing that when a man hasn't anything on earth to worry about,
he goes off and gets married.
- Robert Frost

Married or unmarried, young or old, poet or worker,
you are still a dreamer, and will one time know,
and feel, that your life is but a dream.
- Donald G. Mitchell

When you have a baby, love is automatic,
when you get married, love is earned.
- Marie Osmond

If you made a list of reasons why any couple got married,
and another list of the reasons for their divorce,
you'd have a hell of a lot of overlapping.
- Mignon McLaughlin

Well married a person has wings, poorly married shackles.
- Henry Ward Beecher

My boyfriend and I broke up.
He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to.
- Rita Rudner

My advice to you is get married:
if you find a good wife you'll be happy;
if not, you'll become a philosopher.
- Socrates

Love is so much better when you're not married.
- Maria Callas

Getting married is a lot like getting into a tub of hot water.
After you get used to it, it ain't so hot.
- Minnie Pearl

I married beneath me, all women do.
- Nancy Astor

A man in love is incomplete until he has married.
Then he's finished.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor

When we had been married five years,
we had six children.
What, in God's name, was wrong with me?
- Phil Donahue

In 1947 I married Rowena Palmer, and we have two daughters,
Alison and Claire, and a son, John.
- Martin Ryle

What has the women's movement learned from Geraldine
Ferraro's candidacy for vice president? Never get married.
- Gloria Steinem

It's funny that until I actually met my husband,
I never thought I'd get married.
- Regina King

The amazing thing is that I'm sane.
I'm not bitter.
I'm not drugged out.
I'm not broke.
I'm still married to the same guy.
My children don't hate me.
- Brenda Lee

Aristotle maintained that women have fewer teeth than men;
although he was twice married,
it never occurred to him to verify this statement by
examining his wives' mouths.
- Bertrand Russell

On the whole, show business is a hard business in which to be married.
- Scott Bakula

I don't think I should have been married...
to anybody.
- Mercedes McCambridge

But our waking life, and our growing years,
were for the most part spent in the kitchen,
and until we married, or ran away, it was the common room we shared.
- Laurie Lee

No wedding bells for me anymore.
I've been happily married to my profession for years.
- Shirley Bassey

Can't you read? The score demands "con amore,"
and what are you doing? You are playing it like married men!
- Arturo Toscanini

If you cannot work on the marriage or the women is a moron,
staying married and cheating makes the most sense because
divorce is disruptive to the family life and your bank account.
- Al Goldstein

And since I just turned 32, I'm thinking about getting married,
having a family, and that's very difficult to do on
the road as a correspondent.
- Linda Vester

A really good detective never gets married.
- Raymond Chandler

If and when we get married, only a completely opposite system will prevail.
- David O. Selznick

Women won't let me stay single and I won't let me stay married.
- Errol Flynn

One fool at least in every married couple.
- Henry Fielding

I was ever of the opinion, that the honest man who
married and brought up a large family,
did more service than he who continued single,
and only talked of population.
- Oliver Goldsmith

There's so much saint in the worst of them,
and so much devil in the best of them,
that a woman who's married to one of them,
has nothing to learn of the rest of them.
- Helen Rowland

Always get married in the morning.
That way if it doesn't work out, you haven't wasted the whole day.
- Mickey Rooney

I think if one wants to be in a continual state of
insanity one should stay married to that writing partner.
- Barry Mann

The average Hollywood film star's ambition is to be admired by an American,
courted by an Italian, married to an Englishman and have a French boyfriend.
- Katharine Hepburn

Taylor being married and so on, that does evolve the dynamic on the road.
- Isaac Hanson

You don't stay married for thirty-nine years because
of sex or even because of love,
but because your partner is a real friend to you,
because they respect and regard you.
- Olympia Dukakis


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- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

 


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