Just when I discovered the meaning of life, they changed it.
- George Carlin
As soon as someone is identified as an unsung hero,
he no longer is.
- George Carlin
I think it's the duty of the comedian to find out
where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.
- George Carlin
No one knows what's next, but everybody does it.
- George Carlin
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Inside every cynical person,
there is a disappointed idealist.
- George Carlin
The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.
- George Carlin
By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.
- George Carlin
The reason I talk to myself is because
I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
- George Carlin
If it requires a uniform, it's a worthless endeavor.
- George Carlin
Think of how stupid the average person is,
and realize half of them are stupider than that.
- George Carlin
Religion has convinced people that there's an invisible man
... living in the sky. Who watches everything you do
every minute of every day. And the invisible man
has a list of ten specific things he doesn't want you to do.
And if you do any of these things,
he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire
and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever,
and suffer, and suffer, and burn, and scream,
until the end of time. But he loves you. He loves you.
He loves you and he needs money.
- George Carlin
The IQ and the life expectancy of the average American
recently passed each other in opposite directions.
- George Carlin
One great thing about getting old is that
you can get out of all sorts of social obligations
just by saying you're too tired.
- George Carlin
So far, this is the oldest I've been.
- George Carlin
I put a dollar in a change machine. Nothing changed.
- George Carlin
I would never want to be a member of a group
whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood.
- George Carlin
One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends
is that three out of four murders
are committed by people who know the victim.
- George Carlin
I love and treasure individuals as I meet them;
I loathe and despise the groups
they identify with and belong to.
- George Carlin
If it's true that our species is alone in the universe,
then I'd have to say that the universe
aimed rather low and settled for very little.
- George Carlin
If a man smiles all the time,
he's probably selling something that doesn't work.
- George Carlin
Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"?
- George Carlin
Most people with low self-esteem have earned it.
- George Carlin
I don't like to think of laws
as rules you have to follow,
but more as suggestions.
- George Carlin
Honesty may be the best policy,
but it's important to remember that apparently, by elimination,
dishonesty is the second-best policy.
- George Carlin
Capitalism tries for a delicate balance:
It attempts to work things out so that
everyone gets just enough stuff to keep them from
getting violent and trying to take other people's stuff.
- George Carlin
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
- George Carlin
"Just living is not enough," said the butterfly,
"one must have sunshine, freedom and a little flower."
- Hans Christian Andersen
Just when the caterpillar thought
the world was over, it became a butterfly.
- Anonymous
Everyone is a prisoner of his own experiences.
No one can eliminate prejudices -
just recognize them.
- Edward R. Murrow
Everything is a miracle,
not just the beautiful and lovely things.
- Anonymous
A friend is someone who knows all about you,
and loves you just the same.
- Elbert Hubbard
The River of Life has no meaning,
no good, no bad, no better, no worse,
no love, no hate, no fear, no anger, no joy.
The River of Life has no judgment, no expectation.
The River of Life just IS.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Is today a day to gather strength from the storm -
a day to to learn life lessons for the next battle?
Or is today a day to sit by the fire
and watch the storm rage outside?
Either way, the storm is just life.
Give thanks for all of Life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Don't underestimate the value of Doing Nothing,
of just going along,
listening to all the things you can't hear,
and not bothering.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble.
It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
- Mark Twain (attributed)
I have just three things to teach:
simplicity, patience, compassion.
These three are your greatest treasures.
- Lao Tzu
Life is NOT "Supposed to be Fair."
Know that there is no single way that life is "supposed" to be.
Demanding that life meet our expectations
is a sure fire recipe for a miserable existence.
Life is a game with no rules.
Life just happens to us regardless of our best intentions.
Our only path to happiness lies in being open
to receiving whatever life throws at us -
with Gratitude. Have NO Expectations of life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
If you can't feed a hundred people, then feed just one.
- Mother Teresa
The magic words for a great relationship are,
"I love you just the way you are."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Know the power and the peace of saying,
"I love you just the way you are."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Just stop it. Seriously.
Whatever it is. Just stop it.
If only for an hour, a day, a week.
Stop doing it long enough to get a glimpse
of what the change would actually look like.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Hold on... Joyfully.
Holding-on does not have to be
a desperate teeth-gritting kind of holding-on.
Holding-on can be a joyful
"this is just the nature of Life,
so I may as well enjoy it"
kind of holding-on.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Just Do it!
- Nike ad
What if we just pretended that life was easy?
- Mary Anne Radmacher
For a happy marriage,
love and accept your spouse just the way they are.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Most people give up just when
they're about to achieve success.
They quit on the one yard line.
They give up at the last minute of the game,
one foot from a winning touch down.
- Ross Perot
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves,
Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God.
Your playing small does not serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking
so that other people won't feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine, as children do.
We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.
It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine,
we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear,
our presence automatically liberates others.
- Marianne Williamson
Don't bother just to be better than
your contemporaries or predecessors.
Try to be better than yourself.
- William Faulkner
If you want to feel rich,
just count all of the things you have that money can't buy.
- Anonymous
Intense love does not measure, it just gives.
- Mother Teresa
The best of a book is not the thought which it contains,
but the thought which it suggests;
just as the charm of music dwells not in the tones
but in the echoes of our hearts.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes
What if we just acted like everything was easy?
- Mary Anne Radmacher
A closed mind is like a closed book;
just a block of wood.
- Chinese proverb
Never give up, for that
is just the place and time
that the tide will turn.
- Harriet Beecher Stowe
Improve what you can
and accept all the rest of life
just as it comes.
Know that fear is your worst enemy -
perhaps your only enemy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
We ourselves feel that what we are doing
is just a drop in the ocean.
But the ocean would be less
because of that missing drop.
- Mother Teresa
With every rising of the sun
Think of your life as just begun.
- Ella Wheeler Wilcox
Non-violence is a powerful and just weapon which cuts without wounding
and ennobles the man who wields it. It is a sword that heals.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
It is darkest just before the dawn.
- Proverb
Love is like a beautiful flower
which I may not touch,
but whose fragrance makes the garden
a place of delight just the same.
- Helen Keller
As for accomplishments,
I just did what I had to do as things came along.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
Our greatest weakness lies in giving up.
The most certain way to succeed
is always to try just one more time.
- Thomas A. Edison
The probability that we may fail
in the struggle ought not to deter us
from the support of a cause we believe to be just.
- Abraham Lincoln
Happiness is a butterfly, which, when pursued,
is always just beyond your grasp,
but which, if you will sit down quietly,
may alight upon you.
- Nathaniel Hawthorne
Just start dancing and the band will find you.
- Tama Kieves
What you don't do daily, you probably won't do weekly either.
What you make a habit of putting-off
just keeps getting pushed away again and again.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Just smiling goes a long way toward
making you feel better about life.
And when you feel better about life, your life is better.
- Art Linkletter
And just dance a little.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Just another cold, misty morning inviting,
"want to go again?"
- Mary Anne Radmacher
You don't need a reason to be happy,
just a choice.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I wrap the potential for bitterness,
resentment, martyrdom in the blanket of forgiveness
and just set it down.
Then it just melts in the warmth. And goes away.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
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